Unless you've gone to boarding school, or left to become a Pokémon trainer when you were 10, freshman year is probably going to be your first time living away from your family. You're probably both super excited and a little nervous, and that's perfectly normal. Your parents, on the other hand? They're most likely freaking the hell out. Maybe you're lucky and an older sibling left for college before you, so they have some experience with this and might be calmer. But if you're the first one to get out the door like I was, well, expect the opposite of calm.
This isn't like when you left for that one week of leadership camp, or went on that weekend road trip to your buddy's cabin. You're going alone, and for a long time. Before you leave for USC, you’ll want to make sure you and your parents are on the same page.
Five things they need to know before you leave:
1. You're going to have a pretty busy schedule.
If you're doing college right, that is. You’re not going to have the time to call them three times a day like they think you will. Try to figure out something that works for both of you, like a Wednesday recap call or even texting after class. Just be ready for your mom to send way too many emojis once she figures them out.
2. You’re not going to be able to visit on the weekends either.
This one is more for the people who live near school, but they can't expect you to fly home for every cousin's birthday or something like that either. School is tough, and losing a whole weekend can leave you struggling to catch up for a long time.
3. Yes, there are going to be college parties.
Yes, you’re probably going to go to them. This isn't the end of the world like your parents might think it is. You're an adult, and hopefully, you know how to control yourself. If you're smart, you'll go with a group of friends who will have your back (just don’t call them your squad).
4. Part of college is learning how to live on your own, so they’re going to need to respect that.
You might slip up a few times and fall flat on your face, but that's the part of the college experience that makes you a better person afterwards.
5. That doesn’t mean they can’t send you care packages filled with pop tarts and ramen though.
Because this will be you for the next couple of months:
Four Things You Need to Know Before You Leave:
1. How to do your own laundry.
I can't stress this enough. Don't be that guy.
2. Your parents are paying the equivalent of an Audi A5 every year for you to go to school.
Unless you have a scholarship or some really nice financial aid. Recognize the extra hardship that they're going through, and maybe remind them of how thankful you are for that. They'll appreciate it.
3. You may think your folks are over-reacting, and they most likely are, but they're doing it with the best of intentions.
I went to the beach last week, and my grandmother was scared half to death because she heard about a shark attack in North Carolina (we live in California). The point is, they care about you a crazy amount; so just roll with it when you think they’re overreacting about something. Their hearts are in the right place.
4. Above all, don't forget about your family.
I was going to make this list five things, but honestly, this one is the most important part by a long shot. College is going to be incredible, and you’re going to make some amazing friends this year. But don’t forget about your family. They are the most prized possession you have. And I know what you’re saying right now. “Oh, you don’t know my mom. You don’t know what my dad is like”. You could be spending the next four years five miles from home or 2,500 miles from home. If you don’t keep your family as a part of your life in college, you’re going to regret it.
I know people who just graduated and are taking jobs away from home. Now, they can only see their families in summer and maybe on breaks. Don’t lose them in your lives, because family love is the love that, like it or not, is still going to be here seventy years from now. You are smart as hell, and you could become incredibly successful in the next couple of years. But if you don’t have your relationships, something worth holding onto, then you’re going to figure out soon that it doesn’t mean a whole lot without a true family to enjoy that success with. Celebrate the fact that you go to such an amazing school, but be in a position where you can call yourself blessed to leave behind something that is worth coming back to. And did I mention they can send you care packages?
