There was a point in our lives not long ago when we believed nothing could ever be as stressful as applying to college. Then we actually entered college, and we realized we were oh so very wrong. It probably didn’t happen immediately. Many of us skated through the entire first semester, even the first year or two, without it happening. But some of us weren’t so lucky, and it crept up on us much sooner. And crept is an understatement. It comes at you more like a surprise attack, a jump from behind.
What is it? It is different for everyone, but in general, it is that initial moment of overwhelming stress where you really think about the future for the first time. It is that moment when you realize you’ve never had more work to do in your life, and you can’t remember the last time you checked everything off your to-do list. It is your hazing for the adult world. You start asking yourself questions rapid-fire, Do I like what I’m studying? Is all of this work worth it? So-and-so on Facebook looks so happy at her school, should I have gone there? Should I have taken a year off before college to build houses in South America? How do I sign up for the Peace Corps?
Hours (or days?) later we resurface from this anxiety-ridden haze and reach some sort of conclusion. We do/maybe/don’t like what we’re studying; we will persevere through/dial down our commitments; we do/don’t (90 percent sure this one’s a don’t) have a clear view of what our lives will look like in 10years; and we’ll probably stay put and wait some time before we run off and save the world (or hey, maybe you run off now, more power to you).
For those of us who have experienced this, we know the main issue is that this feeling comes back again and again. And although the later occurrences don’t hold the same shock value, they kick us off our mental balance all the same.
How should we cope? Ahead are some real proactive steps you can take. This list won’t tell you to take a walk on the beach or start journaling. Yes, those things can help your mental clarity, but this list is the next step — how to tackle this looming problem that you can’t even begin to make sense of.
1. Talk to your parents.
They may not be completely objective (how often do they remind you that you are their sole purpose for living?), but they know you better than anyone, and you’ll have a lot less background explaining to do. Whether you like it or not, they do know more than you, and you should probably call them more anyway.
2. Talk to an advisor.
This is important. This can be your actual “academic advisor” or just someone at your school that you trust to be advised by. Stop into whoever’s office this may be, and just talk. They know the school, they know the process, and if you decided to go to them, chances are they know you. Get their perspective.
3. Take a spin class.
No, I don’t put this in the same category of a walk on the beach; it holds a different purpose. Do some sort of intense physical activity, whether it be an hour-long spin class or an Insanity video in your dorm room. Besides clearing your head, this will get all your nerves out and release you of that hiccuping/verge-of-a-breakdown sensation you’ve been feeling for who knows how long now.
4. Plan.
Do the impossible: plan out some of your future. No, you won’t be able to accomplish this in full, but you’ll be surprised at all the little steps you can take. Check out your degree schematics and make a map of classes to see that you’re on a path, even if that path is still changing. Look into summer internships or jobs that either relate to what you want to do, or offer something completely new that you might want to try. Set up meetings with department heads, read up on professions you never knew existed, and do whatever other small, proactive things you can think of that might spark something inside you. This might take a few hours out of your week, but it’s worth it to gain a whole new perspective.
5. Watch some TED talks.
This is just personal preference. Even if you’re already
familiar with
www.ted.com, chances are you
don’t go on it enough. Type it in, click on whatever stands out to you and be
inspired. Ordinary people’s extraordinary ideas never fail to impress. You’ll
probably leave each video with a new life motto.
These are just a few of the endless amount of things you can do. My last tip is to trust your instincts and do what feels right (and healthy) to make yourself feel better. Don’t let anyone give you unwanted advice, stop comparing yourself to classmates you feel are “ahead” of you and be confident in your own decisions (or lack thereof) whether others agree with you or not. You’ll figure it out, just like your parents did before you and just like their parents did before them. Good luck and remember, we all need to be knocked down a few times to know how it feels to stand up (and to find out where we should even be standing).
