Hurtful people come in many different forms. They can be “friends”, teammates, exes, or even just mean people in general. I will never understand why someone would willingly hurt another. I don’t see how seeing someone else in pain, knowing you caused it, could be gratifying.
There wasn’t just one of you. It seemed like in every aspect of my life there was someone ready and willing to tear me down. I had no escape. I stopped living my life to the fullest and just tried to get by without an incident. I remember coming home from school, from practice, crying because I felt hopeless. I didn’t look right, I didn’t act right, I literally hated every single thing about myself. It wasn’t just my peers. People who were supposed to be leaders in my life also had the same negative effect. Some actually, openly, humiliated me in front of others.
You had it all: The friends, the social life, people who cared about what you thought. You made sure I had none of that. You made me feel like I was worthless. I took years of hurt not just from you, but from others too. You had me believe something was wrong with me. I didn’t fit into what you thought was acceptable. I was called names, made to feel inferior and emotionally slapped in the face all for one reason.
I never stood up for myself.
I’m not going to lie and say your actions meant nothing. That I was strong enough to ignore the bad things and continue with my life… But I am now. I’ve grown. I hope you have, too. I hope you realized how much you hurt people. I hope you never hurt someone else the way you hurt me. I hope no one hurts you.
Now, I’m far away from your presence. I’m constantly proving you wrong from going away to school to actually thriving while I’m here. I’ve made new friends. I’ve made so many memories. I found my home away from home, and the best part is that you’re not here. I know that sounds harsh, but it’s really not. I’m finally free from the negativity and pain you brought into my life.
Throughout the years, I’ve learned to lean on God more and more. I know that he didn’t make a mistake when he made me, just as he didn’t when he made you. My faith in God has let me know that I am not worthless. I have a purpose in this world, despite what you told me many, many times. Your presence in my life has made me want to become a better person. I strive to make a positive impact on others’ lives. That’s one of the reasons why I’m studying to be an educator. I want to be that person that brings nothing but love and positivity. If I have learned anything, it’s that just one caring person in someone's life can make a difference. And I want to be that difference.
