""Why don't you just shut up"
"These people are just stupid"
"I don't care what you have to say"
"It's my status, I'll say what I want. If you don't like it delete me"
Quoted above are just a few ways that you shouldn't respond when involved in a Facebook debate. With it being such a tense time in our political society, it is impossible to scroll through your feed without coming across a heated argument that has turned into a complete war zone. Far too often we have people who are posting their opinions but once challenged, they turn into monsters who disregard the concept of simple debate. We have this mentality that if you have a different opinion than someone else that you cant discuss it without becoming rude to one another. As a person who genuinely enjoys debating, I find it aggravating when someone chooses negativity over the discussion.
Lynda Kendall, a Facebook user who uses the platform to discuss political topics, often experiences this and has managed to remain calm in these situations rather than responding back with the same negativity. When asked how she manages to stay collected, she responded "When I'm in the midst of a heated debate, especially when it is pertaining to sensitive topics such as politics or religion, I sometimes have to take a step back before I respond. If I respond in the same fashion with name calling, and bashing someone else's personal beliefs or ideals, that only serves to discredit any point I was trying to make".
Lori Zyla, a debate coach whos team places high in the state with some who have even attended the national competition, has some great tips for those who find themselves overwhelmed in an argument. She says "Stop. Breathe. Organize your thoughts. When people let their emotions rush out they not only make very little sense and ruin any good argument they may have had, but they also tend to use language they wouldn’t use to a person’s face. If more people organized their thoughts and took the time to calm down and re-read before hitting post, I think the Internet would be a much more civil place."
The common idea between these two answers is that you need to allow yourself to calm down before replying. An issue I often think about it the difference between answering with passion versus answering with emotion. You can be completely passionate about a subject and are generally well educated on the issue at hand. If you are emotional about a subject, it is generally based on morals and opinions rather than looking at actual facts. Too often people will reply with emotion. When you do so, you are losing strength in your argument. This isn't to say that you are wrong necessarily, this is just saying that when you replied you were less informative and more so antagonizing.
A way to work against this is to pause. The beauty of social media is that you don't have to answer immediately. If you find yourself getting worked up about an issue, take a minute and walk away. Go get a drink of water or go do something else. Allow yourself the time to calm down and think through with a more calm response that helps your argument as well as is informative to the other side.
Lastly, please remember that it is all just debate. We shouldn't allow differing opinions to come in between family or friendships. We are all people. In the end, we all can agree to disagree and move on rather than allowing negativity to linger. Social media is beautiful and can serve us great purpose as long as we dont abuse it and we dont use the screen as something to hide behind.
