All over Facebook, I see those stupid little pictures that say things like, "Only real women go hunting." I constantly see the little memes that read, "A real woman will get down and dirty." This makes me wonder, what makes a "real woman" anyways? If you ask a million different people, you will get a million different answers. Some may say, "A real woman always looks put- together." Another may say, "A real woman has a little meat on her bones." Despite whatever answer you give, I want to ask a simple question: Who decides what makes a woman real or not?
You may argue that we can all have an opinion on what makes someone real, which we can. But, I want to counter that argument by saying your opinion on the "realness" of another human being does not matter in the slightest. While you may be more attracted to a brunette with a medium build, that does not make a blonde with a larger or smaller body shape any less of a woman. You may be more attracted to a girl who likes fishing more than a girl who likes shopping. Again, neither are more or less real than the other. By saying your "type" is more of a "real woman" than the other, you are disrespecting the truth of another human being.
Also, how are we defining "real" in this case? According to Merriam Webster, there are three basic definitions of the word "real." The first definition is, "actually existing or happening: not imaginary." The second is, "not fake, false, or artificial." The final definition is, "important and deserving to be regarded or treated in a serious way." All three of these definitions fit the description of any woman, regardless of differences. A woman standing in front of you is "actually existing" in space. That cannot be argued. No woman is "fake, false or artificial", whether or not she has had work done on her. And finally, every woman deserves to be treated with importance. Therefore, all women are real.
I will admit, there have been times where i have referred to another woman as "fake. " This is usually because she has been a bad friend or has lied to me. I want to make a clarification though. There is a difference between calling someone out for being disingenuous and unauthentic versus questioning the reality of a woman who has different interests than you. Just because I may call someone a "fake friend" does not mean I am questioning her unique truth. Even if she has not been straight up with me, I am not questioning the reality of her womanhood. She may be a "fake friend" to me, but she is certainly just as real as I am.
We all have our truths. No two people, regardless of gender, have the exact same perceptions of reality. But, I will say this: We are all humans. We are all flesh and bones and heart and mind. We may have different aspirations and values, but we are all beautifully real.
To conclude, here is a quote by Hugo Schwyzer that inspired this article: "Curvy women are real women. Skinny women are real women. Women who have had boob jobs or lip enhancements or liposuction are still real women. Size zero may make no sense mathematically, but a woman who wears that size is as real as the one who wears a size 16. What makes us "real" people is not the shape of our flesh but our basic humanity. And we lose our humanity when we judge- not when we lose weight, gain weight or make the intensely personal decision to undergo cosmetic surgery."
