For the last two and a half years, deadlines have made me feel dead inside. I have maxed out on stress, caffeine, and tears. The seas of papers I swam through felt endless and the countless hours in a computerized trance felt pointless. But with much prayer, many late assignments, and God’s abundant grace, I have made it through college.
No one ever told me that depression and A.D.D. would make college so difficult. Not to mention juggling a work study job and a job at home, all while taking 18 and 21 hours a semester and striving to remain debt free. I have been emotionally, physically, and mentally drained throughout the entire process.
It’s hard to explain to professors that you’re fairly certain that your college experience was not to get a degree. I believe God led me to college for two reasons. One, to establish friendships that I believe will last a lifetime. Two, to grow and grow and grow spiritually.
God has taught me so much through the people and experiences I’ve had here. No, I wasn’t the star student. I wasn’t Miss Involved, I wasn’t the campus evangelical. But I was a struggling Christian grasping for purpose, depth, and love. I was searching for Truth and it was here – amid the due dates, “late agains,” breakdowns, and heartaches – that I found Him.
If you were to ask me what I learned in college, I wouldn't reference a certain professor or class. I wouldn't lie to you and say I am completely prepared to enter my teaching career, and that I'm absolutely confident in my abilities. I would tell you this, though: I learned that God's plans are vast and massive and deeper than I could ever comprehend. I learned that true friendship is rare and when you find it, don't let it slip through your fingers. I learned that investing in people is more important than an A in a class, and that a memory made is worth a C on a test. Most of all, I learned that there is purpose in everything, and that God is using every fear, every failure, and every effort to change me into a person who looks more like His Son.
"And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6
In the words of Relient K, my takeaway from college is this:
"Do what will make God happy
Do what you feel is right
Only but one thing matters
Learn how to live your life"