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What I Learned Growing Up With Military Parents

Military homecomings are just one small part of the big picture.

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What I Learned Growing Up With Military Parents
Alex Van

The military is not just a bunch of Jarheads running around being Neanderthals.

Soldiers are people too. The media makes soldiers out to be distant and emotionless but that is so far from the truth. My parents are some of the most sensitive and affectionate people I know. Yes, there are certain times that they are required to be strong and not show emotion but they're definitely not like that all the time. Among this group of people are the most elite and disciplined minds you will ever meet - do NOT take them for granted. These people feel so passionately about defending America that they have chosen to put their lives on the line - passion is one the strongest emotions and no one can argue that.

Punctuality is EVERYTHING.

Growing up hearing, "If you're not 15 minutes early, you're late." The most annoying but accurate advice a military parent will ever instill in their children. Yes, it was completely necessary to show up 2 hours early to my brother's baseball game and to show up 30 minutes early from picking me up from my friends' houses. Good luck to any kid with military parents that misses their curfew - there is a wrath of fury waiting on the other side of that door for you. When you grow up and have classes to go to and work to do, you will appreciate this lesson a lot more.

Chores are NOT optional.

When that list gets made up on a Saturday morning, you better have those chores done by 14:00 or be doomed (...or grounded). If I had ever thought I was sly and didn't get them done thoroughly then God help me. Have no fear, these tasks do have a purpose. I'm on my own now and I feel a strange loathing for leaving dirty dishes in the sink and clutter (thankfully, so does my roommate). There is nothing like having a military momma to teach you the value of a clean toilet.

Being able to tell which aircraft is which just by their sound.

One of my Dad's favorite pass times is to go down to our local airbase and just watch all of the aircrafts take off and land. Well, what I can tell you now is that I'm fully aware when there is an F-15 or C-40 landing somewhere near. This can turn out to be an impressive skill to some people so I always keep that one in my back pocket.

Say 'I love you' as much as possible.

The fact of the matter is, no one knows when the next war will be. Which also means that either parent could be deployed at any second. Sitting in front of my TV at 4 years old watching the Twin Towers go down was life-changing for me. I may have been 4, but I knew that my parents were about to get assignments overseas. (If you're wondering - my mom did get an assignment but her tour was cancelled last minute - THANK GOODNESS.)

PTSD is real and is a very serious matter.

My dad happened to come home from Bosnia 2 weeks before I was born. I was then referred to as the "Bosnia Baby" by his friends from the Army. He basically was there cleaning up the aftermath of the genocide in Bosnia. He saw a lot of things that the average Joe would not be able to handle. It hit him when he got home and hit him hard. Although I'm sure that he was thrilled to come home to his once-again pregnant wife, the culture shock between where he was and then went to, was heavy. Growing up in my toddler and elementary school years, I always wondered why my Dad was detached from everyone and couldn't control his anger. (Of course, now I just think I was an insensitive little kid.) Eventually he started getting help and accepting what had happen overseas. Now, my Dad is completely different person. We never go anywhere without seeing someone that he knows and it never ceases to amaze me how he connects with people so deeply and quickly. His complete turn-around astonishes me and I'm not sure what I would've done if I didn't have the version of my Dad that I have now. He is proof that there is a way to come back to the people that love you after a traumatic event that leads to PTSD.


There honestly is no down-side to having military parents. They're smart, witty, disciplined, driven, and so so loving. They teach you to bond with people on the most personal level, an irreplaceable trait.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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