What It's Like To Be The "Mom Friend"

What It's Like To Be The "Mom Friend"

You aren't old enough to be responsible for people your own age, but you are.

What is a "mom friend" you ask? Every friend group has one. It's that one person in your squad that stands out from the rest. That one special person that takes care of others, puts everyone else above herself, but still manages to be the hilarious, wild individual that the whole group loves. If you're the mom friend of your clan, I'm sure you can relate.

Mom friends are the best self-esteem boosters.

These people will make you feel like you're on top of the world. They'll make that C+ feel like an A+ and your bed head hair feel like an extravagant updo. Whatever the situation, they'll always make you feel as flawless as Beyoncé.

The mom friend controls her squad at social events.

The designated driver every night. But, do we mind? No way! Mom friends consume fewer calories and embarrass themselves enough without the help of alcohol. We also confiscate the cellular devices before someone drunk texts their mom or ex, or posts an unfortunate tweet. We're always there to keep our friends in line and have just as much (or more) fun.

Nobody can hurt your babies.

All mothers are protective of their young. In the wild, the lioness will stop at nothing to provide for her babies. But, trust me, angering the mom friend is much worse than angering any jungle animal in existence.

The mom friend knows how to fix everything.

Whether it's giving regular haircuts to the boys or giving your best girl friend a back rub after a rough day, you always know how to fix it all... Or so they think.

Much like a parent, you take their side even when they're wrong.

If you're the mom friend, you've probably been told, "If I killed someone, I'd call you to help with the body." Should we be flattered or scared? Who knows. But no matter what, you'll always be the shoulder to cry on and late night phone call. No judgment shall ever be passed; and even though you may not support their decision, you'll always support them.

Your friends literally call you "mom."

"Mom" is a cute nickname that only few people earn the right to be called.

Always finding yourself saying, "we can take my car."

You don't care about the mileage or the gas money. You like feeling in control of your life, and knowing that all your friends are safe and sound with you.

You come off as the bossy friend.

"Don't forget that your homework is due at midnight." "Wear your seat belt." "Text me when you make it home." For some reason, you're always the friend that's barking orders. It's OK, though, because everyone listens to you and they know you're sassy because you care.

You're also the over-emotional friend.

If you see us, there's probably a good chance we're crying. Happy, sad, indifferent... We just have a lot of feelings.

You were chosen to be the mom friend.

No one just comes out and says "Hey, will you be our mom friend?" However, it is a mutual selection. The mom friend sticks out because of her loving attitude and her overbearing personality.

Secretly, you love being the mom friend.

We all try to pretend that being the mom friend is a stressful role. But, let's be real... We wouldn't want it any other way. We actually LOVE feeling needed. We have a job, a purpose. We are our friend's second moms. We're their caretaker away from their caretakers. Quite possibly, the best aspect of all, we are the foundation of our friend group! Your friends couldn't function without you! You are the heart and soul of your squad.

So I will ask all you responsible, emotional, crazy "mom friends" out there to proudly hold your water cup high at the frat parties as you dance the night away and keep a head count of your friends, all while knowing that you will safely tuck them into bed that night; and, most importantly, knowing that you will forever and always be... the mom friend.

Cover Image Credit: Screen Rant

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13 Things You Learn As A College Girl Rooming With 3 College Guys

"If you would have told me a year ago she would be living with three boys and I would be okay with it i would have said 'No way!' But they're good boys." - My dad Mike

The most amazing and horrible thing about being in college is the prospect of roommates. There will be the nightmares that treat your room like a brothel, blow dry their hair while you're sleeping, or use the entire floor as a dumpster. Then there will be the roommates that teach you things and support you in ways you didn't know you needed.

This past year, I have lived with three boys, Joe, Jamel and Michael. At times it was a struggle, like when it came to who's turn it was to DD or buy toilet paper. Don't even get me started on dishes. Through it all though, I have honestly never been so happy with where I live and who I'm with.

Without further ado, here are 13 things I've learned from living with my three boys.

1. Don't buy paper towels when you can just grab a bunch of extra napkins anytime you get fast food.

It's a waste of money to get Bounty when Wendy's has napkins for free! Just stand in front of your friend while they reach their arm as far into the napkin holders as they can and fill the paper bag. These will serve as your paper towels, tissues, cleaning rags, and, in a bind, your toilet paper. Don't worry about running out because someone is always in the mood for Burger King. This "stocking up" mentality also works for Taco Bell sauces.

2. When you say you're going to do something, they will hold you to it.

If you say you're going to work out every Monday, Wednesday, Friday to lose weight for the summer they will help you, in the most annoying ways possible. They will ask you why you didn't go to the gym if they ever see you home doing nothing. If you have anything in your mug that isn't water, one of them may dump it out while saying "We drink water in this house." When you buy a scale and they lose weight they'll tell you how "it's easy." However, when you do start to lose the weight they will tell you that you look good and to keep up the good work.

3. It's a dumb question if you already know the answer.

If you see someone going downstairs with a full laundry hamper, don't ask if they are about to do laundry. If you see that there is a burger on the stove top, don't ask what they are making. What I thought to be harmless conversation starters made me look dumb for the first couple months in the apartment.

4. Boys will not tell you where they are going, but you better tell them where you're headed.

I was out on a date for the day and near the end of it, Jamel calls. Thinking it's an emergency I apologized and answered. I was then yelled at by all three of them for not saying when I left, where I had gone, and what time I was getting home. When they found out I was with a boy the shouts only got louder. "You could have been killed and we wouldn't have known!" When I got home they were all on the couch with their arms crossed. However, if they are walking out the door and you ask where they're going they will tell you it's none of your business.

5. The stroganoff Hamburger Helper is the best of all the Helpers.

As someone who's not a fan of marinara sauce, it's the perfect quick and easy pasta dish for a busy college student. They will not understand why you lock the door all the time.

6. They will not understand why you always lock the door.

I am a 5'4'' girl who is not as strong as any man that can walk through my door. My instinct when I get home and find myself alone is to lock the door. I also lock the door when everyone is home. This has resulted in my being blamed for our front door being broken. I think that, instead of just slamming against the door, the boys should just always assume it is locked.

7. Everyone needs a good girl's day.

The boys have participated in face masks that cleanse and clear your pores, let me paint their fingernails with nail strengthener while putting color on their toes, and have shared more than enough chips and dip to last a lifetime. Everyone needs a little self-care and relaxation.

8. If someone wrongs you, they will not forget it.

A previous boyfriend that I was having trouble pushing out of my life was deemed to never enter the apartment. Another boy that assaulted me, causing me to cry on the kitchen floor caused Michael to want to look him up and talk to him personally. If you have trouble deciding who you shouldn't keep in your life or what actions are unforgivable, the boys will let you know.

9. It ever hurts to have a plunger in every bathroom.

I don't think this needs to be explained and, honestly, I'd rather not go into detail.

10. Your feelings are not wrong, they are valid.

Michael got the brunt of my boy problems. When he would find me upset I would say that I can't feel this way or that I felt stupid and sad. He would always respond, "That's just how you feel. There's no cant. That's how you feel and that's not wrong or dumb."

11. Everybody should give anime a chance.

The first week of living together Joe and Michael explained Naruto for 2 hours to me. The next day we started watching it. I was surprised how great the plot was a how fast I connected with some of the characters (Gara). Michael even watched a show with me that left us in tears (Angel Beats). I have now found shows that I enjoy, such as Erased and Death Parade. My next adventure is Full Metal Alchemist Brotherhood. Also, if you haven't seen Death Parade, do it. It's awesome.

12. They are not afraid to be brutally honest.

I once bought on sale soap that smelled like pomegranates. I didn't even make it a third of the way through the bottle before Jamel and Michael staged an intervention. Apparently, my soap smelled bad. Their only description was bad. I bought new soap two days after that so I wouldn't have to hear them complain anymore.

13. When they pick on you they want the best for you.

The way the boys motivated me is through being annoying. They would give play-by-play commentary on all my choices, make fun of people I starting hanging out with, and made sure I knew when they saw me being lazy. The comments will get under your skin and make you think more often than not about what you are doing. They want to push you to be better. They just push you through pushing your buttons

Now all of the things I've learned might not apply to everyone who lives with a group of boys. Honestly, to live with boys you need some tough skin and it's best if you don't easily bruise. If you meet those qualifications, I do promise that you will have some good memories and find that they are some of the best friends you could ever ask for.

Michael also wanted me to add that a twin size mattress can be used as a weapon. That's a story for another time though.

Cover Image Credit: Courtney Pollock

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5 Ways You Can Be A Better Friend Today

Rome wasn't built in a day, and neither are relationships.

Rome was not built in a day, and neither are relationships. We all have amazing people in our lives that we cherish to no end. But, there are things that we all need to do better to make those relationships stronger and to make those people truly feel validated in their times of need. I myself have a hard time with each of these things, and in writing this, will hopefully be able to put my own words into action.

1. Text them first

This is a struggle that we all have with our good friends, we think thoughts like, “Am I being annoying?” “Is double texting okay?” or you’re being the stubborn friend who doesn’t want to have to be the first one to send a text. Either way, if you are truly going to make a person feel that you cherish their presence in your life, you MUST let them know. And how better to do that than a sweet little text from you? It doesn’t have to be anything more than a simple “Hey this thing reminded me of you” or “Hey I'm thinking of you,” to immediately make someone's day brighter.

2. Talk about yourself less

Friends always go to their favorite people for advice, or to vent, and if you are the chosen person in their life you need to shut up and listen! I say this because within other people’s problems we are sure to see things we have experienced in the past, and want to discuss them, but it is not always the time to do so. You have to be willing to truly hear what the other person is speaking about and make them feel validated in their problem, this is something I struggle with pretty hard. ALSO just make sure that your friend is asking for an opinion before you give one, because they may not have asked for one, and could take it in a way you didn’t intend for them to. Communication is key!

3. Actually, show up

Something that ALL friends do, is making plans and then bail on them. This can make or break a friendship if done too many times though. Sure there are legitimate excuses, don’t get me wrong, but just not feeling like it, will never be one of them. Get up, get dressed, and go see that movie, or have dinner, or just hang out. You make plans because you miss that other person, or because you need them, or because you don’t want to be alone, and when plans fall through it can be a huge letdown.

Bonus tip: Never bail on a friend for other friends, and if you do then don’t share it for the world to see because that can be the quickest route to hurt feelings and sad times.

4. Give them space when they need it

If someone you love is going through difficult times then always make sure to ask them what their needs are, and if they say they need some time apart then you have to respect that, especially if your friendship is the cause of their heartache. It is amazing what a little bit of time and space can do for a person because it gives them the time to reflect on their actions, what they are frustrated with and what they need to do to be a better friend as well. And when you reunite and talk things through, both friends will ultimately feel better about the relationship.

5. Remember small gestures matter

Little things can matter a lot to a friend, do something small for them once in a while. Recently, I woke up quite hungover from a night out on the town and my friend had coffee and a donut waiting for me, that small little move was something that legitimately melted my heard and made me remember how much a small gesture can mean to someone. Grab them their favorite candy when you hit the gas station, or cover them with a blanket if they fall asleep, do a cute photo shoot, any one of those things will remind your friend of the love you have for them.

Friendship is honestly one of the most amazing things about this life we live. You will undoubtedly come across more than just one soulmate in the short time you're given, and when keeping these things in the back of your mind, you can strengthen those bonds, making a friendship last a lifetime. Every relationship hits a bump or two, but it is what you do to make that other person know you care that will keep them around forever.

Cover Image Credit: @theswirlblog

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