What It's Like To Be The "Mom Friend"

What It's Like To Be The "Mom Friend"

You aren't old enough to be responsible for people your own age, but you are.
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What is a "mom friend" you ask? Every friend group has one. It's that one person in your squad that stands out from the rest. That one special person that takes care of others, puts everyone else above herself, but still manages to be the hilarious, wild individual that the whole group loves. If you're the mom friend of your clan, I'm sure you can relate.

Mom friends are the best self-esteem boosters.

These people will make you feel like you're on top of the world. They'll make that C+ feel like an A+ and your bed head hair feel like an extravagant updo. Whatever the situation, they'll always make you feel as flawless as Beyoncé.

The mom friend controls her squad at social events.

The designated driver every night. But, do we mind? No way! Mom friends consume fewer calories and embarrass themselves enough without the help of alcohol. We also confiscate the cellular devices before someone drunk texts their mom or ex, or posts an unfortunate tweet. We're always there to keep our friends in line and have just as much (or more) fun.

Nobody can hurt your babies.

All mothers are protective of their young. In the wild, the lioness will stop at nothing to provide for her babies. But, trust me, angering the mom friend is much worse than angering any jungle animal in existence.

The mom friend knows how to fix everything.

Whether it's giving regular haircuts to the boys or giving your best girl friend a back rub after a rough day, you always know how to fix it all... Or so they think.

Much like a parent, you take their side even when they're wrong.

If you're the mom friend, you've probably been told, "If I killed someone, I'd call you to help with the body." Should we be flattered or scared? Who knows. But no matter what, you'll always be the shoulder to cry on and late night phone call. No judgment shall ever be passed; and even though you may not support their decision, you'll always support them.

Your friends literally call you "mom."

"Mom" is a cute nickname that only few people earn the right to be called.

Always finding yourself saying, "we can take my car."

You don't care about the mileage or the gas money. You like feeling in control of your life, and knowing that all your friends are safe and sound with you.

You come off as the bossy friend.

"Don't forget that your homework is due at midnight." "Wear your seat belt." "Text me when you make it home." For some reason, you're always the friend that's barking orders. It's OK, though, because everyone listens to you and they know you're sassy because you care.

You're also the over-emotional friend.

If you see us, there's probably a good chance we're crying. Happy, sad, indifferent... We just have a lot of feelings.

You were chosen to be the mom friend.

No one just comes out and says "Hey, will you be our mom friend?" However, it is a mutual selection. The mom friend sticks out because of her loving attitude and her overbearing personality.

Secretly, you love being the mom friend.

We all try to pretend that being the mom friend is a stressful role. But, let's be real... We wouldn't want it any other way. We actually LOVE feeling needed. We have a job, a purpose. We are our friend's second moms. We're their caretaker away from their caretakers. Quite possibly, the best aspect of all, we are the foundation of our friend group! Your friends couldn't function without you! You are the heart and soul of your squad.

So I will ask all you responsible, emotional, crazy "mom friends" out there to proudly hold your water cup high at the frat parties as you dance the night away and keep a head count of your friends, all while knowing that you will safely tuck them into bed that night; and, most importantly, knowing that you will forever and always be... the mom friend.

Cover Image Credit: Screen Rant

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.
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Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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How To Resolve An Argument And Make Everyone Happy

It's not easy, but it is possible to solve a disagreement with compromise.

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I wouldn't classify myself as a "confrontational" person. I tend to avoid situations with big crowds, controversial topics, and people who have short tempers. However, to all the people reading who have trouble voicing their opinion, there is a time when everyone has to disagree with something. It might be over food, going out, or more serious topics such as politics. I feel that the one disagreement most of us face is when we are in a relationship, whether that be with a friend or partner.

Typically when someone feels strongly about a topic or situation, they aren't going to change their minds. A common misconception is that "maybe if I talk louder and say another reason why I'm right, the other person will suddenly change their mind and I will win." There are two problems here. First of all, no one ever backs down. If they feel what they are saying is right, nothing you can say to convince them will work. The other problem is that solving an argument means everyone wins, not one person.

Something I've experienced is when something bothers me, I usually don't say anything and let it slide. This causes problems in the future because of what I like to call: the Snow Ball Effect. A little thing gets blown over and it tumbles and tumbles until it's a huge problem. If something bothers you in your relationship, sleep on it, and if it still bothers you in the morning try talking about it with the other person. This solves the problems while they are small instead off waiting for a huge blow up to occur.

It's important to bring something up in your relationship in a particular manner. The situation can go south if it starts with "Look, I hate when you play that video game and you don't have time to hang out." In this case, the person will feel attacked because you are referencing that they are the entirety of the problem and likely not look for a compromise.

If you are going to bring up something that may start an argument, begin your sentences with "I feel." For example, I've said in another article about how my boyfriend is addicted to Fortnite. If his obsession ever got in the way of our plans and it bothered me, I would start my sentence off with, "I feel upset when we can't hang out because of video games." This allows the other person to see how their actions have affected you. Once you have established how you feel, you can suggest a compromise such as having certain times to play video games and others to hang out.

You've probably heard the phrase "three is the magic number" (shoutout to "School House Rock.") If an argument ever gets out of hand and there need to be changes in order to seek a compromise, try saying, "here are three things I'm going to try and do/change in order to get along." Then, ask them what they think they should change. Since you are the first person offering to adjust in order to correct the problem, they will likely be willing to as well.

Arguments are a daily occurrence and come in all types of severity. As long as you are trying to get along with someone who is willing to compromise, just keep a level head and things will work out.

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