About the author: Joy, born and raised in China, is a second year graduate student at Teachers College, Columbia University. She likes to journal what she experiences in the U.S. Joy wants to have as many American experiences as possible.

The other day I heard a little discussion that I found interesting. Let's say your friend that is an actor got an audition and becomes famous after the audition. You then proceed to congratulate him and you feel so happy for him. However, for most, a part of you knew that you were happy because you finally knew someone famous. Say, in a different scenario, both you and your friend were actors. Your friend passed the audition but you failed. Would you, in this case, also be truly happy for your friend?

If you say yes, I would remark it's most likely that you are lying.

I think it goes to the point that people are selfish. Don't get me wrong. I do believe that unconditional love does exist. But I also believe that the unconditional kind of love is the love that parents give to their children only. Other than that, people do love each other for reasons, though reasons might be varied. People love their friends, perhaps because spending time with their friends makes them feel happy and loved. Even in a relationship, people love their partners, perhaps because they just love the feeling of being with them. Nobody hates the feeling of being loved, after all. In other words, it all comes from the feeling and the need of ourselves. We love a certain feeling that certain people give us, then we choose to be with them or to spend time with them.

For me, personally, I like people who love their lives, enjoy their lives, and live freely. Every time I see people dancing freely with the music on the street, drawing pictures under the tree, reading a book in a cafe, or simply taking a nap on the grass, my heart melts. I just love their attitude toward life: simple, easy, peaceful and free. I like people who have their own world, having a little cute habit that makes them feel happy. It can be as little as listening to jazz while taking a warm bath, or consistently meditating every morning before going to work.

That's part of the reason why I like being with kids. Kids always have their own world. They sometimes speak the language that we don't even understand. However, just talking with them enlightens my world. I have a sense of feeling that when I am with kids, my world is free as well. Sometimes I get much crazier than the kids themselves when I am playing with them. I just love their laughing and giggling. I even get the illusion that I was as old as them; I imagine that I'm eight years old.

One of my best friends said the other day that we get along so well because we both have a childish heart. When we were hanging out together, we played bubble on the street, danced in public, or even played lots of so-called "inappropriate" childish pranks. Well... being childish is what makes life more fun! I just love hanging out with people who have a childish heart but also are serious about the way to live their lives.

Well, back to the topic: what do you hold on to in your life? My answer would be love, the love toward life.

Be serious, but also be childish. Enjoy your life as it is! You only live once!