I will never forget my high school graduation. Who does, right? I guess what I mean is that I will never forget the details of my high school graduation. I won't forget the two people's names that I sat next to as we waited to get our diplomas. I won't forget who all was in that building for the sole purpose of watching me take that stage for my 5 seconds of fame, and I'll also never forget who wasn't. I'll never forget seeing my 11th and 12th grade English teacher and how I was too scared to tell her that her class was my favorite because I'm extremely awkward. I'll never forget looking at all my friends that I have made on this journey and thinking how this is the last time I will ever see them again; I won't forget how many friends I lost along the way. And one of the main things I will never forget is our school's valedictorian giving her speech, and the concluding words being an enthusiastic, "we did it!" Yes, we did it. Class of 2017 made it to the end of this leg of the race. Now what?
For some that question is easily answered with sorrowful goodbyes and "fresh new starts" at a college they spent hours on choosing to go to. For some, they are going to travel the world and see things some of us will never see in our lifetimes. Some will be saying a heavy-hearted goodbye to their families as they set sail, take flight, or march off to be a part of the many branches of this nation's military. And then for others, the answer isn't simple at all.
I've never been a school person. Having a curriculum repeatedly taught to me that is based off of the lowest performing student's capabilities has never been a considerably enjoyable use of my time. Having teachers require respect from me but not returning it because they simply "do not have to" has made me resent high school a great deal. So I decided to take a gap year. My main reasoning behind this is for personal reasons that I'll spare you the burden of hearing combined with the fact that school has been extremely stressful for me for multiple reasons other than academic. And then I found myself thinking, what do I do in this gap year?
Do I work a full time job? Do I start partying until the end of the night, getting drunk off of my face and wake up with a hangover? Do I find the love of my life and find out what my future will be with them? Probably not. The real answer is that I don't know. It's a lost feeling. It's kind of like when you're the only one in your friend group that doesn't understand something but everyone else does and they leave you behind to figure it out for yourself. Or like you're staring out into the open ocean in the middle of the night, not really knowing what's beyond the mere mile you can see past. So what do I do?
I probably won't know for a while. But what I do know is this:
My family supports my decisions, which I'm extremely grateful for. Taking a year off is not something to be ashamed of. You know what's best for you and you know what feels right. For me, what's right is taking some time away from school to learn some lessons, make some mistakes, and meet new people. I'm going to get through it some way or another. If you're thinking about following my footsteps and giving yourself some time before entering the collegiate world, do it if you think it's best. I realize it's not a simple option with popular backing but maybe if you're lucky like I am, you'll have that support. Keep in mind, doing this is not an excuse to be lazy. Look for jobs, look for opportunities, but also have fun. This time should be a learning experience, where you gain some more knowledge of who you want to be and how you're going to do it. Take the most criticism because you're part of the real world now where things aren't sugar coated. Things will come naturally, some things more brutal than others. Just remember to keep your head on straight and keep marching on to the beat that makes you happy.
"Happiness can be found in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."
-Albus Dumbledore
