In a society that values individualistic traits, it is difficult to abstain from noticing even the slightest of differences among us, from the physical structures that compose us all to the way that we think. As a society, expressing our thoughts and subsequently analyzing them has become an inherent trait.
I grew up around the same people for most of my life. More importantly, I grew up around the same type of people, so there was little guesswork in trying to figure most people out. Yet, college is a funny place. It seems to defy anything and everything that I have ever believed and, quite frankly, I think that is how it should be. I had previously considered it to be a place where people go to find themselves, but, ironically enough, I believe that I have learned more about other people in just one semester than I have in my whole life.
College has given me the opportunity to branch out and find something other than what I am used to. When I'm asked the question, “What is the number one thing that surprised you about college?” I always answer the same way: the people.
Personally, I would say that I have always had pretty high expectations for people and, looking back, probably a pretty narrow idea of what a friend should be like. For that reason, I quickly became frustrated when my new college friends did not act or think in the ways that I expected them to and I subconsciously attributed this to them being bad friends. However, I now realize that these thoughts were completely premature and unfair.
Not everyone thinks the same way that you do. Even the most basic psychology lecture can tell you this. In the nature versus nurture discussion, we realize that parents have different parenting styles and that even the smallest of our decisions, and the decisions of those around us, can have a huge impact on who we are. We come from different cultures, different backgrounds, and we each have our own stories. Additionally, everyone has their own battles. A good friend of mine once told me that you can never really judge a person because you never know what they could be dealing or struggling with on the inside.
College taught me that there are friends for different occasions and that not everyone has to be exactly the same. Maybe not all friends will be like my hometown best friend, who I could call at 2:00 in the morning to go on a gummy bear and ice-cream run. Then again, it was important for me to realize that I had met amazing people in college as well, from my study buddy who would watch lectures late into the night with me to that friend who never bailed on a dining hall dinner.
Most of these college friendships are new and, like most new things, they grow and evolve when given the chance. From my experience, I believe that I have gained a new insight into what it means to be a friend. I have learned to appreciate friendships in their own way and embrace the differences.
