I went away to school instead of staying at home. I needed a change of scenery and I needed to get away from everything. I needed to spread my wings and fly away from the nest. I had always been a bit more independent than dependent on others, so I applied to colleges all over. I think the farthest I applied was a little over six hours away, but I had been looking at others.

I ended up choosing the University of Mary Washington in Fredericksburg, Virginia. It’s a relatively small liberal arts school with a little more than 4,000 people attending. I was still in Virginia, but I was far enough away to the point where I wouldn’t have my parents coming to see me all the time. Phones were invented for a reason.

I arrived to campus at a little past 10 o’clock that morning and I was excited and a bit nervous. Sure, I had been away from my parents before, but this was new. I was going away and not seeing them for a month or so. I moved in and got everything how I wanted it. I’m actually still decorating and getting everything in place. And when it was time for my parents to leave...I cried like any normal person would.

The first thing I learned was from that. I needed to leave my hometown and get away from everything I was used to because it wasn’t helping me grow as a person. I was so used to my parents being there and telling me everything that i never got to make my own life. Sure, they let me do things with my friends. My parents were actually probably some of the most lenient parents I know. They could be strict and firm when they wanted to, but for the most part, I did anything I wanted (within reason) because I was a good child. I didn’t break the rules, I did my homework, I hate what was put in front of me at the dinner table, etc.

I needed to learn how to be strong and to say goodbye, now I cried yes, but I haven’t cried since I said goodbye to them and I’m sure that when I leave after going home in the fall that I will cry, but as the years go on I’ll get better at it.

Being in a new city, with new people and a different way of living and looking at things has really shaped me as an individual. I’m away from my best friends and they’re just like me, but they can make friends fairly easy. Me, I was used to hanging around with the adults, but being at college has really helped me to make friends and step out of my comfort zone, just by the people I have met and where I’ve gone.

I mean I walked to the grocery store from my dorm. I would not have done that back home because well for one I couldn’t really and another because I didn’t want to. Here, I kinda have to and I find the walking refreshing even if I’m carrying grocery bags and it’s a whopping 97 degrees outside. I’m doing something I would never have done before had I stayed at home and gone to school there.

I’m making friends with the people in my hall and with classmates. I’m not missing my best friends as much as I was and thought I would. I still talk to them at least every other day because I like to catch up with them and because they have always been there for me and understand me better than people at school do at the moment.

Something else I’m enjoying is this sense of community and involvement and inclusion that I get when I walk down campus walk. I’m constantly seeing something going on and that’s for everybody and it’s not been a month since school started. I really got that sense of connection while at Eagle Gathering, which for those that don’t know is when all the upperclassmen welcome the incoming freshmen class and there are candles and we sing the school’s alma mater. It’s a beautiful moment and it solidified my feelings about being a student here and being an Eagle.

In Danville, I’m used to it and at the same time I’m not. Everywhere I went in Danville I knew somebody, here, I’m meeting new people from all over and it's the sense of community, belonging and acceptance that has really made this transition easier. Danville, we're welcoming to people sure, but at the same time we're still a bit distance to new people.

Another thing I've learned since being away from Danville is the multi-cultures I've gotten to experience. Danville is a small town and we're mostly made up of caucasians and African Americans. We're also very conservative and that means Republicans...I hate to admit it but we (speaking as the royal we) are still very set in the ways of segregation and very discriminatory to all races not just African Americans. So, coming to UMW, I've seen less and less of that. I mean I know not everyone is like that, but being here is very refreshing where I don't have to deal with it and see the prejudice that goes on.

So, being away from home as opened my mind to new lengths and has really helped to shape me into a better person in only a month. My advice, choose somewhere different to go to school and don't be afraid to try new things and do things you wouldn't necessarily do back home. Trust me, it will make you into a better person, both mentally and physically. It's okay to miss home, but you can't let it consume you, you have to live your life and become your own person.