It’s Friday night and it is time to go out. You had a long week, you’re ready to let loose and have a good time with your friends. You were supposed to have left 10 minutes ago but you were too busy trying on your entire closet and all of your friend’s clothes. What are you even supposed to wear to these things? What outfit could possibly suffice for a crowded dark party where it’s almost guaranteed someone will spill something on you. You grunt. It’s not that you don’t have any clothes it’s just that you don’t have any going out clothes. But what does that even mean? I mean, this summer you resorted mainly to T-shirts, shorts and flip-flops with the occasional appearance of chacos… is it possible have lost touch with your party style? Do you even have a party style?
If this scenario has never applied to you then maybe you just have excellent fashion sense and are one of those people who never look over or underdressed, but I am certainly not that person. I have always been one to second-guess outfits and change tops a million times before putting on that one tank top I tried on first because I know is comfortable and looks good. The other day as I got ready to go to a party with my friends, I put on a black tight skirt and black lacy top. My friends, wearing wedges and dresses, all complimented the outfit and I felt great… yet unconvinced. I felt so uncomfortable in my own skin and in the clothes I was wearing. It got me thinking, where was I even going that I felt like I needed to dress up in “going out clothes”… and what do “going out clothes” even entail?
Later in the week as I browsed through Tobi.com’s “sexy tops” tab on their website I felt silly. The items I had in my cart were not my style by any means. I would never buy them for any other reason or occasion. So what was I buying them for now? Why did I feel like I needed to buy them? I became insecure about not wearing what other people were wearing when I neglected to realize that everyone’s style was their own and that I didn’t have to mimic that to be considered fashionable or presentable.
There is a preconceived notion in college that when you go out and drink you need to represent a certain type of look. Be it fancy, classy, or even revealing. When I go out with my friends and I see them wearing skirts, platform sandals, and crop tops I think to myself, “Damn. They look good. They look hot.” It makes me think, should I be wearing that? Should I look "hotter?" I know that my friends don’t dress the way they do to look ‘hot’ or sexy, they dress that way because it makes them feel good. And they look hot and sexy because they are beautiful and confident. So slowly but surely I am coming to the conclusion that even if I am in jean shorts and a T-shirt in a room of skirts and bralettes, it doesn’t matter. Because I will look sexy and hot because those are my going out clothes and they make me feel good.
