I went to a Trump rally this week.

I'm not sure what made me do it. The rally was just down the road, in Fletcher, North Carolina. It was, hilariously, located at the same place as a tractor show. The rally started at noon and it was free. That's probably why I went--because it was free. Or maybe I went because I was confused.

No, I'm not confused about for whom I am casting my vote. I was confused at what people who support Trump must see or think. I figured that there had to be something different about his rallies, something that isn't this or this or....well, you get the point. And boy, was I wrong.

As I said, the rally was supposed to start at noon. I arrived at the Western North Carolina Agricultural Center around 10 a.m., at which point I tried to find the Davis Building. Because I had never been to the Ag Center, I walked around for a little bit trying to find my way. At that point, I was accused of not having a ticket by a volunteer who looked as though he was a teenager wearing his dad's suit. After getting that sorted out, I waited for about a half-hour to make my way through security and into the rally.

The rally was already in full swing when I got there. Apparently, the noon time slot was actually when Donald Trump was supposed to speak. Somewhat misleading, but whatever, I can adjust. I heard Sheriff Sam Page speak to the crowd and rile them up about how Trump wanted to build a wall. I heard former Congressman Jimmy Duncan mumble his way through a speech that was interrupted with multiple chants of "LOCK HER UP." I heard current Congressman Mark Meadows extol Trump's virtues of creating a safe America by calling a terrorist a terrorist. One of the quotes that will stick with me forever is "Donald Trump would never hug a terrorist." Good to know I guess. And then it was time for the main event.

Or so I thought. At 11:30 a.m., the MC of the event asked the crowd if they were ready for Trump. And they were. I was really impressed at how hype the group, of mostly older people, was to see Trump; it was deafening on more than a few occasions. But their excitement was misplaced. The next hour was filled with The Rolling Stones "Heart of Stone" and other Stones' songs on a loop, interspersed with "Funeral for a Friend/Love, Lies, Bleeding" (a live version, no less), and my personal favorite, "I Want It That Way". Ya know, this song. And if you think a bunch of college kids get excited to hear that on karaoke night, you haven't seen the elderly listen to this song. I literally watched couples dancing to Nick Carter. It was pretty glorious. Then, finally, at 12:35 p.m., The Donald took the stage.

The place went berserk. I was about 50 yards from the stage, so not all that far, and it was by no means a filled house. Yet the second people could see him, I couldn't see anything over the signs and people taking video. For reference, I'm about 6'3" in shoes--maybe 6'4" on a good day. And I couldn't see anything. It was pretty incredible. And in that moment, I could see how people get caught up in the fervor of these rallies. But then Donald opened his mouth and I remembered why I was there.

When I first walked into the rally, Trump volunteers were passing out free signs that read "Women for Trump." They were free, keep in mind, while every other piece of Trump paraphernalia there had to be bought and paid. And the signs were the first thing that he mentioned when he got onstage. " Look at all these 'Women for Trump' signs, I love it." He went on to say that the media is lying about the support (or lack thereof) that he is receiving from women. He also repeatedly stated that the media has tried to rig all the election coverage and that Hillary was given all of the questions in advance of every debate. "But it doesn't matter because we won."

The real highlights came at the end though. While discussing the amount of money that the Clinton campaign has spent on their ads, he had this just beautiful aside. "Most of those ads are phony ads. Most of the stuff those say is untrue. Some of it.....well...might be true." And the people in attendance fucking laughed.......He followed that up by saying that his advisors don't like him bringing up specifics because "I like to deny things." He then went on to call President Obama and Joe Biden "losers and babies." And I had to leave.

Trump only spoke for about 35 or 40 minutes, but in that time, I felt real hatred and fear in the WNC Ag Center. Everything that Trump said, everything that rippled through the crowd, it all fed into this worst-case scenario angle that Trump is obviously trying to work. And all I could think as I looked around the room was that no matter the outcome of this election, we're fucked.

But we're not fucked for the reason that you would think--what with us having two less than desirable candidates. We're fucked because people truly believe the things that Donald Trump says. Whether they be racist, idiotic or just plain wrong, the crowd ate up every word he spoke, complete with call and response sessions. It was like accidentally stumbling upon a cult that you didn't know existed, except that they've become immune to the Kool-Aid.

Going to that Trump rally made me feel things. It made me feel angry at my fellow man for supporting this animal. It made me scared for the direction that we've been on that has led us to this point. It made me a little depressed that every generation older than mine seems set on dealing me a bad hand. But it also made me slightly hopeful. Because, as bad as this sounds, those generations won't be around for that much longer.

We have a chance to impart some real change in our futures. But we have to start now. Go out and vote. Make your voice heard, because if you don't vote, you can't bitch. And you better believe that if Trump is elected president, I'll be doing a lot of bitching.