No more tossing and turning in bed tonight. Drinking a glass of warm milk before bed will help Patrick sleep better— it’s not just an old wives tale. He pours the freshly “hand” squeezed milk bought at old Jon’s Farmers Market down the block in a cow shaped mug while scrolling down a totally non-interesting blog. What Patrick does not know is that most farmers use milking machines today that are faster and cleaner, and the cows are milked in a room called the milking parlor. But he doesn’t care about all those facts; he just likes his milk steamy and perfectly smooth on top, so he can savor it with his tongue. A farmer usually milks a cow twice a day, 365 days a year once the animal’s udder is full, and Patrick just thought how even a cow was being touched three times more than he was nowadays. Splattering pure white milk everywhere, he falls under a headline titled “Fidel Castro Had a Bizarre Obsession With Milk.”

No more aching bones, Patrick acknowledged in the back of his head when he is done drinking the warm milk while reading about the Cuban dictator and his plan to breed super cows. On average, it would take one hour to milk six cows as it takes each cow about four to five minutes to milk. Patrick never felt sympathy for the cow, but he began having some for himself. He barely lasts that amount during sex before his knees start cramping up. After seeing Ubre Blanca or White Udder, who was Cuba’s famous cow for producing 110 liters of milk in only one day, breaking The Guinness World record in 1982 , he wished he were her.

No more weight gain, Patrick truly believed, would be accomplished if he drank milk, although it was his fifth cup of the day. After heating the milk up on the rusty stove for two straight minutes he noticed a rich and creamy layer known as the skin of the milk. From under the counter, he quickly pulled out a milk automatic stirrer and from the side grabbed the heavy sugar container in form of a cartoonish cow. Patrick noticed his hands were somewhat alike to the characteristics of the milk, but the only problem was that he was turning old and wrinkly. Stepping all around the white tiled floor, Patrick could feel his feet getting wet from the splattered milk, dirtying the socks that had the pattern of a cow. He caught a glance of a photo taken of Ubre Blanca for the blog about Castro and panicked after witnessing how large the cow had grown to be.

No more memory weakness or gastric problems, he began thinking once he drank the warm milk, giving off a small giggle at reading the article. Patrick wondered how Castro developed an obsession with milk. His frontal teeth began to tremble from the amount of dairy routinely consumed. A reflection of himself bounced off of the fridge and saw how the buttons were about to burst but simply decided some cold milk would solve his bloated issue, but he was actually turning just as large as the Cuban cow.

Beyond just seeing his own reflection, he saw the man he loved watch him pour the milk. But now, all Patrick could think about was how smooth Mark was, with all the calcium in his bones. Suddenly, he felt a touch. He wanted for things to be steamy again between them but just like the milk production in Cuba struggles to meet demand, Patrick no longer could keep up with the means of having sex.