We've all heard the saying, "I just need some time to heal."

Well, how truthful can it be to say that statement?

We live in a society where it has been ingrained in us to not acknowledge the time we may need to actually heal and recover from any lingering scars and leftover trauma. We often cover up all of our scars, as if we are wrapping ourselves in more layers of clothing, rather than actually giving some time to heal them, and taking the layers off, one by one.

But it is time we try to take off the layers and express our desire to want to heal. Most oftentimes, healing takes time and is a process. It isn't something that we see that we can get done in a day. We need the time and energy to heal before we actually decide to go through the process.

One thing I have learned about healing and recovering wounds is that there will always be people who are "there for you" but it is meaningless if we are not there for ourselves first. We have to be our biggest fans and support system (me, myself, and I). If we are not supportive and there for ourselves through the process, we will only end up in a backflip where we can't stand right back up.

As someone who has had several illnesses and mental health struggles throughout her life, I have become immune to saying "no" to healing. I have always wanted to envision a better circumstance, where I would be stable in my identity and not struggle with mental health or just a mid-life crisis. The word "struggle" can mean a multitude of things, but the word "heal" can only mean one. There are different ways of struggling, but there's only really one way to heal and recover.

Be your own diary to yourself -We are often constrained to keep things personal to ourselves. Diaries are something that became popular to most of us in high school and middle school, when we wanted to speak to our conscience and our identity. If we become our own diary to ourselves, we can embark on a journey of confiding and self-reminders to hopefully establish a better connection with ourselves, that can put forth a better circumstance for us to heal.

Create a pledge to yourself -If we give ourselves the authority or superiority to the situation or circumstance, we can only go in a direction that we feel is right for us. Self-healing is a process that shouldn't be taken lightly and should be based on our motives and wants (the healthy ones of course!)

Be able to rely on yourself and who you are -Although this may be much easier said than done, especially if we already have a large established support system around us, sometimes we need to rely on our identity and who we are, as individuals to heal. There will be people around us who will be willing to support us in any way possible with open arms, but we have to support ourselves first before any of that happens.