Waking Up Sick

Waking Up Sick

Before you judge, walk a mile in someone's shoes

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Waking up in the morning sick is a horrible feeling. That is not intended to be a pun. It's the truth. When you wake up feeling like your entire body hurts, you are in chronic pain, and you question whether you will be able to make it through another day, it is a horrible feeling. You just don't know what to do.

Climbing out of bed takes every ounce of energy you have. Or what little energy you have. Rolling over to even get to that point feels like you've been hit by a pickup truck. Or a train. Whichever one would do the most damage and hurt the most in a short period of time. And when you finally get the energy to actually lower your feet to the floor, you feel like you've been hit with a brick. You stutter. You shuffle. You say a small prayer that you're not going to go crashing to the floor. You don't want to have to be "that person" that cries, "I've fallen and I can't get up."

Waking up sick is a horrible feeling. And again, that's not a pun. Nor is it intended to be. It's just the truth. But what's sad is that you can walk by your co-worker, your best friend, your neighbor, your wife, your kids, or anyone else that you encounter during your day and they have no clue what you're going through.

You can go to church and listen to people preach about Jesus, say they'll be there for you and they'll give you the support you need but they have no clue what's going on in your body or your mind. You can walk by your neighbor who always tells you, "I'm here for you if you ever need anything," but in reality they know little or nothing about what you're suffering through.

And you don't want to discuss it with your wife, girlfriend or your kids. You don't want to worry them. You don't want to put fear into their hearts. You don't want to scare them. You don't want them leaving the house wondering if maybe today is, "the day" and they might find out later on you've died. You don't want to put that fear into anyone's mind. But the reality is, it could happen. Because waking up sick is a horrible thing. And you just don't know when that could be the last day you wake up.

Trying to stumble through the day is misery at times. Trying to do the things you love hurts like hell. Trying to walk through the mall takes more out of you than you ever imagined. Taking your dog for a walk puts fear into your heart and makes you wonder if maybe you'll just die while a half a block from home. At times you question whether you're going to make it through the day. And at times you question if there is a part of your body that doesn't hurt.

It's a horrible feeling.

When you wake up sick, you sit there for a second. You question if you can do it. You ask yourself if it's worth it. You want to roll back over and go back to bed. You don't want to leave. It doesn't take energy to lay there all day. It doesn't hurt to just sit there and not move. It doesn't send you through spasms of pain that make your entire being feel like it's been hit with a freight train full of rocks. You can sit there all day. Watch TV. Watch the world go by. And not hurt.

When you wake up sick, you don't know what it's going to bring during the day. Will the pain get worse? Will it finally stop? Will it put you through the most horrible misery you could ever imagine? Will it be a struggle to do the simplest actions during your work day? Will you be able to function? Can you keep a smile on your face? Or do you just want to tell the world that you hurt and you wish it would stop.

It's a horrible feeling.

When you walk by someone, you may see a smile on their face. They may say hello. They may ask you how you're doing. They may ask about your kids. They may ask about your wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend or your dog. And if you take 30 seconds to ask them, they may answer with the simplest, "I'm doing great. Thanks for asking," when in reality their body may be hurting, they may be suffering from the most unimaginable pain that anyone could be going through and all they have going through their head is, "I want to go back to bed and never leave."

When you wake up sick, it's a horrible feeling. You suffer. You struggle. Your body hurts. Everything about you hurts. You feel miserable. You don't want to talk to people. You don't want to smile. You don't want to walk. You don't want to run. You don't want to talk. You don't want to hurt. If you have never experienced that? You should try walking a mile in someone's shoes that lives it every day. It's not something I would wish on anyone in the world.

When you wake up sick you struggle, you battle, you fight and most times you lose. It hurts like hell. You cringe when you move. You question if it's going to hurt the next step you take. You question fi you will be able to take the next step. You wonder if today is going to be worst than yesterday. You wonder if tomorrow is going to hurt worse than any day that you've ever had. It's a horrible feeling.

You don't know what someone is going through. They can smile. They can shake your hand. They can give you a hug. They can ask about your day. And all the while the pain is unbearable. They feel horrible. They are suffering. They are struggling. They are barely making it through the day. It took everything they had to roll over without it hurting so bad they wanted to cry. It took everything they had to drop their feet to the floor. It took even more to walk across the bedroom, get in the shower, do what needed to be done and get through the day.

I wouldn't wish that on anyone. It's a horrible feeling. I know.

Because I live it every single day.

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25 Things To Do After 1 a.m.

You never remember the nights you went to bed early.
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I'm a night owl, and at a clean, Christian university, it gets a bit rough trying to find things to do after one in the morning. If your adrenaline's pumping with or without friends, here are some things you can do for free or using that crumpled twenty dollar bill in your pocket.

1. Dick's.

If you're feeling frisky in the wee hours of the morning, head to Dick's with some friends.

Or if you're looking for something more adventurous...

2. Watch a movie.

Reserve a time slot at the movie lounge in your dorm, pop some popcorn, and watch your hall mates cry at your favorite tearjerker.

3. Go on a walk to nowhere.

Without using a map, just walk with no destination in mind. Try to find your way back without any assistance. Of course though, be safe.

4. Jam out.


Bust out someone's guitar or triangle and go to town. If you don't know anyone who plays an instrument, borrow a speaker and blast a good tune.

5. Cards Against Humanity.


People get weirdly inappropriate when they're tired, this makes it the optimal time to play Cards Against Humanity.

6. Gasworks Park.


I swear the park is more beautiful at night when no one's there. Plus, nothing beats the adrenaline rush than when geese surround you on all sides.

7. Late-night drive.


Go for a scenic drive like the one shown above.

8. Go somewhere that's usually full of people and see it empty.

It's hauntingly beautiful to see somewhere that's typically crowded and see it completely empty. It's a private moment that you'll get to remember every time you go back.

9. Watch something in your queue on Netflix.


Hey, you put it there for a reason.

10. Learn that one thing you've been meaning to.


Whether it's a new skill, language, or hobby you want to pick up, learn it now! There's no time like the present. Or, surf some Wikipedia articles and jump from one related article to the next.

11. Scooter races.


Find out which of your hall mates will do anything to win.

12. Table topics.

If you want to find out more about your friends, but the only question you can think of is, "How do you feel about Dick Cheney?" Table Topics are perfect.

13. Retail therapy.

Or, you can do what I do and add everything to my basket and then cry when I see the total.

14. Watch the airplanes fly in.


Knowing that each airplane holds dozens of people who have their own lives and are off on adventures or returning home is so humbling. Also, airplanes look like shooting stars if you squint.

15. City wide Fugitive.


Basically Cops and Robbers, there are two groups of people. Group A tries to make it from Point One to Point Two (we had everyone meet at a park and try to make their way back to campus) without being caught by Group B. Group B is usually dispersed into cars and they flash their headlights at someone from Group A if they're seen.

16. Beth's


Who isn't down for breakfast food at two A.M.? Any 24 hour diner will do, but Beth's is the best.

17. Pinterest baking party.


Even if you don't succeed, it'll make for a good photo (and hopefully still taste good).

18. Salsa dancing.


Or swing dancing. Or learning how to do the latest dance. Dancing is the perfect way to bond by making fools of yourselves. Plus, it might lead to a vicious dance battle between R.A.'s.

19. Picnic on a roof.

Preferably a flat roof that you're not trespassing on, but make do with what you can.

20. Stargazing.

Stargazing is my absolute favorite way to pass the time using the Planets app on my phone. If you're having some trouble identifying the stars, Star Chart app is super easy.

21. Watch the sunrise.


Just pull an all nighter to see the sunrise. It's way more rewarding compared to seeing a sunset.

22. Get a tattoo.

If you just want something simple and know someone who has experience, get a stick and poke tattoo. Even though stick and pokes tend to not last as long and don't look as clean as a professional tattoo(you have to go over it a couple times), it's still a tattoo! Make sure the needles are sterile and you're using the right ink.

23. Skinny dipping.

Maybe not during this time of year in the Pacific Northwest, but spring has to come around sooner or later.

24. Karaoke.


Hit up a karaoke bar with some friends and sing your troubles away. Boxcar Ale House, Ozzie's in Seattle, Crescent Lounge, and Hula Hula are open until 2 a.m. while Seattle's Best Karaoke is open until 3 a.m.

25. Sleep.

As my roommate always says, "Nothing good ever happens past 2 a.m."

Cover Image Credit: Teresa Tsang

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To The Girl Who Gives Until There’s Nothing Left, It’s Time To Focus On Yourself

Sometimes, you have to finally put yourself first.

parek1
parek1
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To the girl who gives until you can't, I know you. I know you because I am you. I have been in the same shoes you have, and I have given myself to others until I couldn't anymore, and it still wasn't enough for those around me. And you know what? That's ok.

You see, we give and give and give because we care. We put others needs and wants above our own, and we do this because we want the people we love and care about to be happy and to feel loved. In the process though, we can sometimes lose ourselves, and I'm no stranger to this. I've played the part, in my relationships and friendships, I've made excuses for people and seen their lack of reciprocation of care as a mistake, not an outright disrespect to myself. And I've done this until I can't anymore. I give myself to a person until who I am has been decimated to making them happy. But I've realized that we can only give for so long. We finally reach a certain point in our lives when we can't give anymore, and we have to rebuild ourselves on the idea that it is finally our time to be happy.

Your happiness is what's going to get you places in life. We have only one life to live here on Earth, so while we have this short time, make yourself happy while trying to make others happy. For those who truly love you and who care about you as much as you do them, they will want to see you just as happy. So girls, whether it be in your romantic relationships, or your friendships, or even your familial relationships, just know this: You will reach a point when you can't give any more. You will be broken, and you will have a sense that you have lost yourself. Just know, you can and will pick the pieces up and when that time comes, that is your signal that now is the time to focus on you and your happiness.

It will be ok, and you will be ok. You've given so much to make others happy, now it's your turn to make yourself happy. It's time to find the things that make your heart warm and your insides tingle. It's time to find the little things in life that bring you joy. It's time to make your life about you. So go get lost in the sound of the ocean waves. Go to that art show you've been dying to see. Take that class that you're interested in. Find the things that you feel make your life meaningful and happy.

Take care girl, because I speak from experience when you make your life about the things that bring you happiness, everything in your life becomes more worthwhile and has more meaning. Life becomes golden when you pursue your own happiness.

With loving sincerity,

A girl just like you

parek1
parek1

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