"Never do today what you can put off until tomorrow." -some guy I'll look up later.

It must be frustrating being an editor. I say that because most writers that I know tend toward procrastination. Many of them also deal with depression, and that is a lethal combination when it comes to deadlines. I just can't get the deadline part of adulting down. There are several other parts of adulting that I have not mastered, but I can hide many of those, being late with everything, well, people tend to notice that.

“Procrastinators unite!... Tomorrow.” That is the motto of the true put it off until later crew to whom I ascribe. There are several reasons to procrastinate. These are my top 3.

1. I’m busy and I over-committed myself, yet again. I don’t need one more thing to do, but as I have not yet found fulfillment in any of the things I am currently doing, I keep adding to the list hoping to find my reason for everything. Surely there must be a reason? I can’t just be on this planet to live and die for no good purpose, can I? I’ll figure it out later.
2. I’m in one of those dark night of the soul periods and I fear that everyone else will see that I am right if I share my deep dark thoughts. So I just don’t want to communicate with anyone in those times. Who needs an entire planet of depressed people when you can’t even stand to have to listen to your own depressed thoughts? Maybe tomorrow I’ll find a therapist. But what if I tell the therapist my depressed thoughts and he/she realizes I am right, and I destroy their career as well? What a conundrum.
3. I honestly don’t realize how quickly time passes. This is the most likely cause of my procrastination. I mean just this morning I woke with the thought, “Is it seriously a new month already?” There is Halloween stuff at the store and fall decorations everywhere. Isn’t there still a month left of summer? I have friends who already have their Christmas shopping started or finished and wrapped. I can’t even wrap my head around all the school supplies and clothes that I can’t afford.

In part, it comes down to this, I just want to do what I want when I want, and I don’t want to constantly be thinking ahead. And maybe sometimes that is good. Present moment living is what Buddhists call it, and they stand behind that life. It can be good for you as living in the past is futile because you can’t change it. You can allow it to change you by learning from it, I guess...but that is for a different musing. And living in the future is impossible, because it isn’t here. Yet it may get here, and so we must in some sense be prepared for it. That kind of effort and planning sounds a bit too grown up for my tastes though.

When I really sit back and think about this I’m slightly concerned about how I am going to make it through Graduate school. But hey, I’ll worry about that tomorrow!