There are many things I want to say to you, yet I don’t know how to put them into words or how to communicate them to you, in part because you’re still too young to understand, and also because we live so far away from each other that I never have the chance to talk to you in person.

It must sound strange that someone would ever describe their siblings as “estranged,” and it is. But I have my reasons, and I want you to hear them because this is really what I feel deep down in my heart. I know that the likelihood of us ever seeing each other will only decrease as time goes on due to geographical separation and diverse situations of our personal lives, so this is my opportunity to express my true feelings towards you.

I have never felt any connections between us, not ever since I first held you in my arms when you were little. I don’t want to come across as heartless, but this is true. I do not feel any sisterly bond with either of you, no matter how hard I try to deny it. I guess it is because we don’t share the same parents.

You are my father’s daughters, sure, but I feel like that is not enough. Please know that just because I don’t have any sentimental and familial attachment to you doesn’t mean that I hate you. On the contrary, I really want to make the time to be with you two and get to know you better. I don’t want to make excuses for my lack of feelings towards you, and I certainly don’t want to be known as the horrible brother who neglects his sisters, but this is just the way things go for us. I truly believe that you two deserve a much better brother than me, who cares about you and who truly and wholeheartedly loves you. I am so very deeply sorry that I can’t be the brother you two and dad need me to be.

I truly am sorry.