Vegetarians Don't Need You To Point Out What We Can't Eat

Vegetarians Don't Need You To Point Out Everything We Can't Eat On The Menu

"Oh look there's a salad for you to eat, oh but there's bacon in it. Looks like you can't eat it."

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No, seriously, we actually don't need you to point out that the section on the menu called "Steaks" is out of the options for us because I am pretty sure anyone who is a vegetarian can still read.

As long as I can remember, I have been a vegetarian. No, it wasn't some kind of lifestyle that was forced on me as a kid, because if you come from a Hispanic household, you already know meat is always on the menu. Around the age of 12, I decided to officially become a vegetarian and it was mostly because I just didn't really care for meat. Meat always tasted weird, it was always too chewy, too dry or tasted gross.

Of course, I always had, like I am sure many of you have experienced, people telling me "Oh, you've never had a good steak, burger, chicken, fish...blah..blah..blah." I am sure like most of you, you've probably at some point had something that was considered to be the "best" thing and turned out it was just what you expected, just eh.

Or maybe you're not like me and you decided to stop eating meat for more of an environmental reason if so, kudos to you! Though you've still probably dealt with the majority of what anyone else has and it's only been getting worse.

More specifically with your friend group, you always have those one or two people that love to bring up how you don't eat meat. Almost as if your dietary choices are there for their entertainment or the main topic of conversation.

Which honestly is where I believe the whole "how do you know someone is a vegetarian" joke started, it was probably someone who just kept bringing it up for someone who didn't feel the need to mention it. My question to you, the people who constantly do this, is why?

As a person who is always down for a good joke, be it at my expense or not, I just don't get why bringing it up all the time is funny?

Or if it's even supposed to be a joke? Seriously, when going to a restaurant or fast food place I guarantee you the person who has a certain dietary restriction will be able to read the menu and realize what they can and can not eat without your comments of "well looks like YOU can't eat anything."

I can not tell you how many times over the years I and some of the people I know who are also on plant-based diets have had to deal with this. It makes going out with those people unenjoyable, and it's probably why if you are the person who is the offender of this "crime," you haven't been invited out.

Now I know some of you will argue that the only reason you bring it up, every time, is because you are just looking out for your friends. Sure, there are definitely people who genuinely have concerns for your ability to join in on the meal, but more likely than not, you've approached it in more of a manner of questions rather than a form of accusation.

Bottom line is when you know someone who is on a plant-based diet, if you really care about their dietary restrictions, just ask them if they need help finding anything on the menu. Or better yet, just don't say anything unless that person brings it up in concern themselves. If not, you really just seem like a meathead, and we already don't like meat, we'd hate to add you to that list too.

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To The Person Who Feels Suicidal But Doesn't Want To Die

Suicidal thoughts are not black and white.
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Everyone assumes that if you have suicidal thoughts that means you want to die.

Suicidal thoughts are thought of in such black-and-white terms. Either you have suicidal thoughts and you want to die, or you don't have suicidal thoughts and you want to live. What most people don't understand is there are some stuck in the gray area of those two statements, I for one am one of them.

I've had suicidal thoughts since I was a kid.

My first recollection of it was when I came home after school one day and got in trouble, and while I was just sitting in the dining room I kept thinking, “I wonder what it would be like to take a knife from the kitchen and just shove it into my stomach." I didn't want to die, or even hurt myself for that matter. But those thoughts haven't stopped since.

I've thought about going into the bathroom and taking every single pill I could find and just drifting to sleep and never waking back up, I've thought about hurting myself to take the pain away, just a few days ago on my way to work I thought about driving my car straight into a tree. But I didn't. Why? Because even though that urge was so strong, I didn't want to die. I still don't, I don't want my life to end.

I don't think I've ever told anyone about these feelings. I don't want others to worry because the first thing anyone thinks when you tell them you have thoughts about hurting or killing yourself is that you're absolutely going to do it and they begin to panic. Yes, I have suicidal thoughts, but I don't want to die.

It's a confusing feeling, it's a scary feeling.

When the depression takes over you feel like you aren't in control. It's like you're drowning.

Every bad memory, every single thing that hurt you, every bad thing you've ever done comes back and grabs you by the ankle and drags you back under the water just as you're about the reach the surface. It's suffocating and not being able to do anything about it.

The hardest part is you never know when these thoughts are going to come. Some days you're just so happy and can't believe how good your life is, and the very next day you could be alone in a dark room unable to see because of the tears welling up in your eyes and thinking you'd be better off dead. You feel alone, you feel like a burden to everyone around you, you feel like the world would be better off without you. I wish it was something I could just turn off but I can't, no matter how hard I try.

These feelings come in waves.

It feels like you're swimming and the sun is shining and you're having a great time until a wave comes and sucks you under into the darkness of the water. No matter how hard you try to reach the surface again a new wave comes and hits you back under again, and again, and again.

And then it just stops.

But you never know when the next wave is going to come. You never know when you're going to be sucked back under.

I always wondered if I was the only one like this.

It didn't make any sense to me, how did I think about suicide so often but not want to die? But I was thinking about it in black and white, I thought I wasn't allowed to have those feelings since I wasn't going to act on them. But then I read articles much like this one and I realized I'm not the only one. Suicidal thoughts aren't black and white, and my feelings are valid.

To everyone who feels this way, you aren't alone.

I thought I was for the longest time, I thought I was the only one who felt this way and I didn't understand how I could feel this way. But please, I implore you to talk to someone, anyone, about the way you're feeling, whether it be a family member, significant other, a friend, a therapist.

My biggest mistake all these years was never telling anyone how I feel in fear that they would either brush me off because “who could be suicidal but not want to die?" or panic and try to commit me to a hospital or something. Writing this article has been the greatest feeling of relief I've felt in a long time, talking about it helps. I know it's scary to tell people how you're feeling, but you're not alone and you don't have to go through this alone.

Suicidal thoughts aren't black and white, your feelings are valid, and there are people here for you. You are not alone.

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline — 1-800-273-8255


Cover Image Credit: BengaliClicker

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I Am Looking Forward To These Things When I Am An Adult

Growing up can be fun at times.

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I know it's super important to live in the moment and to enjoy the time we are living in now, but I am excited for a few things when I grow up. Yes, I still consider myself to be growing up because although I am "legally" an adult, I still am dependent on my parents for a lot of things. I don't have a job with a sufficient income, I don't have a place to live on my own for myself, and the list goes on.

I am not looking forward to having to do those things, but, I do look forward to a lot of things when I am older. I look forward to the moments that I don't know when they will happen, but I want to happen so badly. I look forward to the things that are huge life moments that will be surrounded by stress, but the actual moment itself is a moment of pure bliss.

I am looking forward to the day I have kids from my first child to the however many more I have some day. I don't know how many I will have, but it will definitely be more than one. I don't know when I will have them, but I am excited to bring little tiny humans into this world and raise them.

I cannot wait to be a mom and just be a kid's world. I know that it will be filled with grossness and stress, but there are going to be moments that are priceless and perfect, and I cannot for those moments. Those simple moments that will mean nothing to my kids, but the world to me.

I am looking forward to the day I adopt a dog on my own as like an actual adult. Growing up, I've always had a dog and these dogs are my best friends. I love them so much, and all I want to do when I am home is cuddle them. These dogs are the definition of perfection, and when I am home they sleep on my bed with me and I love it. It's the best part about being home from college.

I know that raising a puppy and a dog is stressful, as my youngest dog is 4, and she was a lot to handle at first. Since I was 15 when we got her, my parents made me train and raise her, and it was a journey. I had no idea what I was doing, and it is stressful trying to potty-train a crazy, energetic and attention-needy puppy, let's just say that. I love her so much though.

I am looking forward to getting my first job in my desired career path. I know that means I will be doing work, but I know I am going to love my job so much and when I get that job and sign that contract, everything in college will be worth it. All of the time spent in class, doing homework, stress zits, will all be worth it.

Finally, I cannot wait to travel into a random place in this world and document it. I don't ever want to be a travel vlogger, but one day I want to bring like a vlogging camera and go to a random part of the world for two weeks and film every part of the journey. There's something cool about traveling and filming it on an actual camera instead of your phone because it makes it real in a way.

Look I know traveling is expensive and stressful, but everything in life is stressful. Nothing in life is perfect, if it's perfect it's probably not real. I am excited for the little bits of fun and priceless moments that you can only get from these experiences. You only get your first job once, you only become a mom once, you only get your first dog/pet once, you only travel by yourself for the first time once, and I cannot wait to experience these emotions.

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