Recognizing The Value Of Your Friendships Makes All The Difference

Recognizing The Value Of Your Friendships Will Make All The Difference In Your Happiness

It's all about quality, not quantity.

351
views

In life, people will come and go. As you go through the motions, you'll begin to seed through and discover who's here for a long time and who's here for the good times. Although not everyone is in your life for the same reason or the same amount of time, that doesn't mean they all aren't important, because they are.

Growing up, I didn't have this mentality. I always assumed every person was there for the long-haul, that somehow I would get back what I gave. Time and time again I was left hurt or sad because I put my all into a friendship for it not to be reciprocated. But as I've gotten older and matured, I've come to realize that simply is not the case, that not everyone will give back what you put in. And since I've realized that, I have become a lot happier and feel more fulfilled with the friendships I do have because I cherish the ones who put in what I give and then some.

You see, every single person who enters your life does so for a reason. Maybe it's to teach you something. Or to help you grow as a person. Or maybe even just to have some laughs and make some memories. No matter what it is, recognize what each person is bringing to your life.

In the recent years, I have acknowledged where my friendships stand, recognized the people who are there for fun times, who I can have a laugh with, who without fail are simply fun to be around. And, more importantly, I've recognized that they might not be there for the hard times, for those moments when you're world feels like its crashing down when you just need that shoulder to cry on. This doesn't make them less important, but I have learned to take these friendships at face value.

I've discovered the friends who are in my life for more than just the laughs. These are the ones who don't just come around when they need something. They genuinely want to know what is going on in my life. They ask about my day, about my classes, my family. They want to know if I'm doing ok. They don't hide when the going gets tough. They get their hands dirty and jump in without question to be by my side and lift me back up.

These are the gems, the ones you don't give up easily, the ones you fight for. These are the friends you can be yourself with, can have those weird and random conversations with, the ones you can be honest with, whether it be good or bad, the ones who without question will be by your side for the rest of your life.

I fully acknowledge that not every friend I have in my life is going to be there forever. There are times when I wish some of them would be. But I'm not naive. I know certain relationships change, they become more surface level. And that is ok.

People change. Friendships change. We grow. Sometimes the people around you grow with you and sometimes they don't. That doesn't diminish their key role in your journey.

I am so grateful for every friendship I've had. The ones that faded out with time, the ones that may have ended badly, the ones that are simply there for the fun times, and, most importantly, the ones who will be with me for years to come.

Don't take relationships for granted, but also don't put too much energy on the ones that will not last.

It's all about quality, not quantity. Remember that and I guarantee you'll be much happier with your friendships.

Popular Right Now

32 Reasons Why I Love My Best Friend

The list stops at 32, but I could go on forever.
105156
views

My best friend is my soul mate, and I am so lucky that this crazy world brought us together.

1. She has and always will put up with my ridiculousness.

2. She has seen me cry, and I have seen her cry, and we are both ugly criers.

3. We can sit in silence for 20 minutes, and it’s not weird.

4. But most of the time we cannot shut up.

5. This includes three-hour phone and Skype calls about anything and everything.

6. I know what she’s going to say before she says it.

7. Eye contact is all that is needed to communicate sometimes. This definitely comes in handy when we have an opinion that shouldn’t be verbalized.

8. Even when she laughs at me, I still feel loved.

9. We find the dumbest things funny.

10. We have reoccurring jokes that normal people just find odd.

11. She accepts every part of me including my flaws.

12. She talks me through hard situations without fail.

13. She tells me when I’m being unreasonable, and I don’t get mad.

14. She listens to me whine about the same guy and still hasn’t given up on me.

15. But gets more excited than anyone when a guy treats me right.

16. But you have both agreed that life would be easier if we could just marry each other.

17. What’s mine is hers, and what’s hers is mine.

18. This includes, but is not limited to clothes AND food (and that is a big deal for me).

19. She knows exactly how to cheer me up. Most of the time cupcakes do the trick but if they don't, somehow she make me feel better with insides jokes or just plain silence.

20. She has seen me at my worst and still loves me.

21. She will see movies meant for 8-year-olds with me and we will, no doubt, laugh the loudest.

22. She will watch"The Bachelor" with me and will secretly love it. Don’t worry ... No judgment from this side.

23. She will teach me the art of taking a good picture.

24. She gets me out of my comfort zone and makes me do things that I am iffy about at first.

25. But hanging out in our pajamas and talking all-night isn’t abnormal either.

26. Being apart for a long time is no biggie because when we are reunited it’s like nothing had separated us!

27. We plan on traveling the world together.

28. We plan on being roommates in the future.

29. I love her family and she loves mine.

30. We fight like sisters and then we apologize and get over it.

31. We talk about the craziness we will participate in together when we are 80.

32. I can’t imagine my life without her.

Cover Image Credit: brokenbutfree.org

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Dear Freshman Year Roommate, Thank You For Being Someone I Always Looked Forward To Hanging Out With

From the first moment we met and bonded over our love for bubble tea, I knew our friendship was going to be special.

151
views

When I was applying for college, I was concerned with supplemental essays, SAT scores, scholarship applications and letters of recommendation. I never took a moment to stop and wonder "What happens once I get in?"

Finally, the fateful day arrived where I made my college decision. I bought a sweatshirt from the George Washington University store. My mom decorated my High School locker with our colors. And most importantly, I sighed a breath of relief imagining how refreshing it was going to be to ride out the rest of my senior year without the stress of college deadlines weighing on my shoulders.

Unfortunately, that blissful serenity was cut short when I joined a Facebook group of admitted students, where profiles of smiling teenagers flashed on my screen accompanied with the fateful "I'm looking for a roommate."

A roommate. I obviously knew that I needed a roommate. It was common sense, yet for some reason, I had failed to consider the logistics of finding a roommate until that moment.

See, my mom helped me through my college process, but times were different back then. She described showing up to her college on the first day, not knowing who she had been randomly assigned. There was no Facebook, Snapchat or Instagram to help you communicate with the girls on the other side of the country-- or sometimes even on the other side of the world.

This was a new, unexplored territory where my mother's wealth of knowledge sadly fell short.

Lucky for me, I was accepted into an honors program which restricted the list of girls available to be my roommate to a list of about twenty-five. We created a google document which asked basic questions like "Are you a night owl or earlier riser?"

Even still, I had no idea how to pick someone who I would be compatible to live with for the next year of my life. The stakes felt high, but I was reassured by the fact that I grew up sharing a room with my siblings, learning some important skills about being low-maintenance and tolerant of others' habits.

I read through the list and found someone whose answers sounded similar to mine, figuring we had enough in common to be amicable, if nothing more, throughout the school year. Her name was Riya, and she had a cute Instagram, so I messaged her asking if she wanted to try and room together. She agreed and we put each other down as roommates when applying for housing.

Looking back, that decision was the best one that I made when preparing for GW.

Throughout my freshman year, I have heard horror stories about roommates who fight all the time, steal each other's clothes, refuse to clean or try and micromanage the other's sleep schedule.

All the while, I count my lucky stars that my roommate is not only sane but someone who I genuinely look forward to spending time with. We share ice cream and inside jokes. When the weather was heating up and the university refused to turn on the air conditioning, we even shared our fans.

It comforts me to know that at the end of even the worst days, I can come back to my room and laugh or cry (sometimes both) with her by my side.

I remember once, I was having trouble with another group of friends. I felt alone and isolated. I felt like there was nobody who I could talk to apart from my mom or my best friend from home, who are both supportive and incredible but don't know any of the characters in my life in the same way as someone here at school.

I have a bad habit of struggling to reach out to people when I'm going through something, figuring I am strong enough to handle it on my own.

While that may sometimes be true, thanks to Riya, I didn't have to. I ended up telling her everything. She listened to me rant, understanding how I was hurt, and advising me on the situation.

I felt so much better after our conversation, and the best part was, I didn't have to leave the comfort of my bed for the entire conversation.

Her friendship reminded me of my family, and honestly, she has acted like a sister to me over the past two semesters.

It is so wild reflecting on the year, knowing that next semester we will be going our separate ways, living with respective friends in buildings a couple of blocks away from each other.

However, even when the posters are off the walls and signs reading "Riya" and "Emilie Joe" no longer stick to the outside of our door, I know that the bond we created in room 217 will never leave us.

Related Content

Facebook Comments