As a girl who has had her fair share of single Valentine's Days, I have a few tips on how to get through it. If you're 21+, grab a few of your best single girlfriends, an endless supply of white barefoot Moscato, and several bags of chocolate. Here are some of the rules.
Take one sip if...
1. Your Mom or Grandma send you a Valentine's Day card.
You know that they are just trying to be nice because they know that you'll be forever alone but you'd really rather them not. Maybe if you're lucky the card will be funny.
2. You see an Instagram of flowers.
We get it. You love your boyfriend. He's so cute and sweet because he gives you flowers. We hope that you're allergic to the pollen.
3. A couple posts a picture of their date online.
Sorry. I couldn't see how cute of a couple you are because I was too busy staring at your food. Bring me some sushi please. It'll go great with my white Moscato.
4. You see a teddy bear.
Usually, teddy bears are cuddly and fluffy but on Valentine's Day they just remind you of how alone you are. If you have any teddy bears in your room hide them for today. You don't need that negativity in your life.
5. You see a girl carrying balloons and chocolates across campus.
Thanks, girl, for bragging about all the balloons and chocolate you have. I buy my own chocolate and it tastes just as good. Pass me a balloon so I can get a hit of that helium.
Chug for 10 seconds if...
1. You drunk text your ex, or they drunk text you.
I may be lonely today but I'm never that lonely to talk to you again. There's no way that I'm touching you with a 10-foot pole today or any other day of the year.
2. Your Mom sends you flowers.
This little girls face says it all. Thanks, Mom -- but no thanks, Mom.
3. Someone on Tinder messages you to hang out.
You may feel like this is a good idea but trust me, it's not. Don't respond to this message until after the Valentine's Day blues are over.
4. You see your ex on a date.
Okay, relax. This could be the worst thing ever but look on the positive side. Maybe she's just going on a pity date with him.
5. You third wheel your friends on their Valentine's Day dinner.
As long as you're eating food it really can't be that bad. Maybe there are other people third wheeling at the restaurant that you can bond with.
Finish your drink if...
1. Someone on Facebook gets engaged.
Yup. It's all over. Just finish the bottle.
































