As soon as January is over it's pretty much pink flowers and red hearts all around. February is the month of love, with Valentine's Day around the corner whether you celebrate it or not you have to take notice because of the advertising and decorations that hype the day up (super odd since this isn't even an real holiday..). Personally I'm not a big fan of Valentine's Day, I'm more of a Halloween girl myself, but what I really don't like is the message it pushes. There's never anything wrong with celebrating love and appreciating the special people in your life. That comes with the unrealistic expectation that love is easy, fun, and is something that will stick around no matter what.
Again, like in most of my articles, I feel the need to acknowledge the fact that I am young, so it's fair to say that I don't have enough life experience to make the statements that I will in the following paragraphs. However, I consider myself VERY blessed by the amount of successful, love filled relationships I have had the privilege of witnessing. My parents being the top of the list all the way to the end watching my best friend of 10 years marry the love of her life right after high school.
Every relationship is different, but if you find two people that are genuinely committed to being together in a healthy way you can just tell, they all look the same. "Falling in love" can happen quickly and unexpectedly, in fact it probably will happen that way if you're with the right person. Valentine's Day represents the good times, the happy times, the roses and sunshine of a relationship. It doesn't prepare you for what love really is like. Love is getting up every morning and making a decision to do right by the person next to you, to accept them, to build them up, to work together, and to get through the really hard times still loving each other as deeply as before.
I know we all hear people say that you have to make things work in order to stay together but I don't think you really understand it unless you grow up around relationships that are tested and make it through better than they went in every single time without fail. That's how you learn that love isn't about the breakfast in bed, and sweet gifts, and cute pictures, but that those things are outcomes of having someone you can count on no matter what. You get to that point by being with someone that makes you feel safe, even when the future looks really bleak. You have to find someone that can make you laugh when things are really hard, so you're reminded that one day they'll be good again. You have to find a person that puts your mind at ease and calms your anxieties, whatever they may be. You reap the benefits after you put in the work every single day to be in love after you fall for someone. That's what you should celebrate on Valentine's day, because that's what most people never find.
