Unashamed: My Journey With Lecrae | The Odyssey Online
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Unashamed: My Journey With Lecrae

I've been unashamed for awhile, here is my story.

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Unashamed: My Journey With Lecrae
Ray Neutron

Just Like You....

I can’t tell you the first hip-hop song I ever heard, but I remember the moment I fell in love with the music genre. While spending summers and holidays in south Alabama, all I wanted to do was be like my older cousin, Bryant. He had the swag, the confidence, and the girls. He was known for his craziness around town, so the neighborhood kids called him “Dirt.” But the biggest impression that Bryant left on me was his music taste. Since Bryant was a little older, I was able to experience things that I typically did not get to in my house. Wrestling, Adult Swim, but more importantly, BET - not that my parents wanted to keep the programming BET had away from me; I assume that they felt I was not ready for this at my young age. I remember we were in the ‘den’ area of the house and BET’s Rap City was on. This show was incredible exposure for me, because I got to see the people “Dirt” was trying to emulate.


The show was centered on the host Big Tigga as he conducted interviews, showed hip-hop videos, and hosted freestyles. Artist videos from Jay-Z, Ludacris, David Banner, 50 Cent, Common, OutKast, and all the other rappers that were popular during the early 2000s. Then there was the day it all changed for me.

The year was 2004 and I was watching Rap City when a video of a fairly “unknown” rapper named Kanye West had a video premiered. Mr. West was primarily known for his production credits (Jay-Z, John Legend, Mos Def, Common, etc.) but wanted to pursue a career as a rapper, and "Through the Wire" was the song that started it all. I was immediately captivated. His flow, his lyrics, his style, his confidence - everything spoke to me. He sampled old soul records that I grew up listening to with my parents. He dressed more like a middle class citizen, and had an underdog story surviving his car crash and broken jaw. He had a few more singles, but none more significant than "Jesus Walks"


Growing up in a historical, black denomination, I was always told that Christianity and Hip-hop did not belong together; Kanye West not only addressed this, but proved this idea wrong. Not only is the song still to this day incredible, it captivated the musical world. This one song secured in my mind that both could exist when needed, but more importantly I had found my influencers. I remember getting a pair of Air Force One’s just because Ludacris had some. I began a Cd (yeah they were a thing) collection of some of the hottest hip-hop of the time. My dream job was to be a radio personality, just so I could play hip-hop music and interview some of these artist. My parents were happy that I had found a passion, but they were not a fan of the lyrics. I would also realize that most of my friends at my majority white public school did not listen to the same music I did, and that was okay; it made me a rebel. Little did I know that things would change.

The "Good" Life

In 7th Grade I began to have a lot of spiritual questions. A lot of them would not be answered until years down the road, but like most middle school-aged youth, I began to question what was going on around me. A lot of this was brought about by a middle school friend named Drew. Drew was not like most students. Drew was an unapologetic Christian. He was never afraid to share the Gospel with those around him at the lunch table and invite them to his church. Drew didn’t swear, talk negative about girls, or cheat on school work. I called myself a Christian, but my life was nothing like Drew’s. Drew also hated hip-hop. We, until recently, used to get into arguments about the validity of hip-hop, but he helped point out the misogyny, debauchery, and “sin” within the lyrics. So, in an attempt to get my life together I dropped hip-hop, cold turkey. For about a year I stopped listening to music all together. In 8th grade I began listening to the music my friends liked. Led Zeppelin, U2, Metallica, Motley Crue, and whatever else rocked out. My parents started to question me, I had gone from banging Lil Wayne to Led Zeppelin. This lasted about a year until I just needed hip-hop again, but I did not want the vulgarity for it was “sinful”. Therefore, I followed my parent’s suit and went to old school hip-hop. Run-DMC, Public Enemy, Beastie Boys, and whoever else. It was so bad that I performed Run-DMC’s “Walk This Way” in the middle school talent show (we won by the way).


I held on to these musical genres until the summer of my freshman year. I had stopped trying to answer a lot of my spiritual questions, and had resorted to being the "morally good" guy. My lifelong friend, Josh had persuaded me to come to an FCA camp in North Carolina that would end up being life-changing in multiple ways. Some of the spiritual questions I had during the time were answered, but in the oddest of ways I would be reconnected with hip-hop. Little did I know that coming up to a predominately white evangelical Christian camp that I would be exposed to what at the time was modern hip-hop? But this hip-hop wasn’t ordinary hip-hop, it was Christian hip-hop. The artist was Lecrae, and I wanted to get his music. He was rapping, but was also rapping about the Gospel. A part of me hated my home church for not exposing me to this music. Similarly to Kanye, I was hearing a rapper rap about Jesus.

My Whole Life Changed

I came home from the camp a changed man inside and out. I had hip-hop again. I was even more on my “good-boy” kick but now I had more motivation. I got every Lecrae album in existence. I would tell people he was better than all the big name rappers just because he rapped about the gospel. Lecrae was my introduction into Christian hip-hop, leading me to discover other artist in the sub-genre and finding sites like Rapzilla. This all lasted for about a year and then I found myself getting tired again of the music.

I am extremely thankful for Christian Hip-Hop; it played a major role in my spiritual development, but after consistent listening I found issues with the music. To me, the music lacked musicality ,and focused more on the lyrical content of sharing the gospel. Which in itself is not a bad thing, and there is definitely a time and place for these things, but I longed for the days of dope musicianship and thought-provoking lyrics. For whatever reason, I was still not in the place for what those around me called secular music, so I was stuck. However, I would be brought back into the world of hip-hop in the summer of 2012. Lecrae was going to immerse himself in the hip-hop world. Working with what the church would deem secular producers and artist, but not losing his faith. All this came together in his critically-acclaimed mixtape, "Church Clothes".


A mixtape with production from some of the biggest producers in the game such as 9th Wonder and S1. Co-Signs from artists such as Kendrick Lamar, DJ Premier, and Statik Selektah. My worlds had come together. My Christian faith could exist with good hip-hop. In fact while Lecrae was challenging me to pick up the reasons for God by Timothy Keller he also inspired me to engage the genre of music I loved so much. While reading Keller I was also digesting Kendrick Lamar. With a new lens, I could engage hip-hop and culture but not lose my faith.

Freedom

Fast forward four years down the road and Lecrae has collected a following that has made him one of the most influential evangelicals in the world. He has had a mix of appearances from Passion Conference to the BET Hip-Hop Awards. He has been on the Tonight Show and done TED Talks. He has been recognized amongst the greats such as Eminem, Kendrick Lamar, and Kanye West. He could interview with Sway but also host a session on Christian arts. He now has two Grammy’s to his name and a New York Times Best Selling Book. He has 10 projects under his belt and does not seem to be slowing down. I’m not here to worship or idolize Lecrae, for he does not deserve that. What I would like to do is acknowledge that he, just like some of the rappers before him, is trying to live as authentically as he can. Both in his music and personal life.

As he finds himself more comfortable with who he is, the same goes for me. Is he the best rapper in the game, no? Do I like every single song? No, but he is an honest person that makes honest and humbling music, and that is something to be appreciated.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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