We all have a love/hate relationship with social media. It's great to keep up with old friends, share exciting news with your distant family, and keep up with the news without turning Netflix off. Along with those pros, there are the cons. Between drama, subliminal posts everyone assumes are directed at them, and the oversharing- I think all of us have considered a social media hiatus.
I often find myself on social media and I couldn't help but observe all of the different types of people that we all have on our friends list, so what would be more fun then listing them and adding a "profile picture" stock photo?
The Perfect Friend
80% of their pictures are on a beach with their gorgeous and toned significant other. They're always checking in at the best, newest restaurants on Facebook then posting a picture of their food on Instagram. All of their selfies look like a candid picture taken by a professional photographer.
The "Perfect" Friend
They post paragraph statuses about how hard they work and how blessed they are to be so successful. They are usually single and love to remind their followers that they don't need anyone else. They put a lot of effort into their selfies.
The Proud Parents
You've seen so many pictures of their kids, you can't remember what your friend looks like. They go "live" on Facebook for their kids' band concerts and basketball games. They throw the most epic, themed parties...for their children.
The Bodybuilder
They check in at the gym religiously. You can't go one day without seeing them in a gym mirror or wearing a slightly too small shirt. They live on green smoothies and grilled chicken. Unusually tan in January.
The Political Analyst
They watch Stephen Colbert daily and cannot pass a political story without adding their Facebook reaction. Often arguing with middle aged men of the opposite political party in CNN's comment section. They take beard grooming seriously.
The Friend Who is Always Selling Something
Many of their posts start with a sales pitch inducing question. They add you to groups and invite you to their sales events, even if you haven't spoken to them since fifth grade. They are always ready to help you change your life. Caption selfies with, "Love what you do."
The Friend who "Needs Opinions"
What dentist should they take their kids to? Which haircut should they get? Where should they go for dinner this weekend? They cannot make a decision without Facebook's opinion. Lives for messy buns.
The On Again and Off Again Friend
50% of the time they are posting cute pictures of them and their significant other or 'feeling' in love. The other 50% of the time they are sharing Pinterest quotes about cutting toxic people out of their lives. Their friends are always supportive and telling them "you're better off without them!" or "you guys are sooo cute!"
The Oversharer
They don't go anywhere without checking in. They don't eat anything without posting a picture of it, or the recipe. You're always updated on their health issues, family members, and everything they bought today. You can count on them to help the Friend who "Needs Opinions."
The Invisible Friend
You often wonder if they deleted you or disappeared. You rarely see them post anything besides an occasional like or comment or a mutual friend's status. Has had the same profile picture since high school.
The Post Sharer
Their status updates are few and far between, but you can count on them to share at least three animal videos, two food videos, and a picture quote everyday. Cat lover.
The Subliminal Queen
Many statuses begin with, "People who..." or "It's funny when..." When people comment with questions as to what they are talking about, they almost always say "They know who they are!" Text their friends to like their post after they post it.
The Confidence Booster
You can count on them to like all of your posts. They have the sweetest comments on everyone's pictures. If any of their friend's need a post shared for a contest or a Go Fund Me page, you bet they share it.
The Old Friend
I don't mean you've been friends for years, I mean they are above 50. They enjoy commenting on pop culture stories with "who cares?" or "why is this news?" Often complaining about millennials. You typically have to keep them on your friend list because they're family.
The Fun Friend
They go to the best concerts and bars. They're always checking in downtown or asking, "What's going on tonight?" Excellent fashion sense.
All of us are probably guilty of being one of these friends, or many of these friends. Despite your social media friends' flaws, you have to love them. What types of friends did I forget?
