Growing up with a sibling who is practically your oppositeĀ is hard. Having that same sibling in a different Greek organization than you, can make your life even harder. Dealing with condescending remarks about how one organization is better than the other, or having to hear from your parents which they prefer the best, becomes a constant topic in your household. At some point, your sisters from your organization start feeling more like your actual sisters rather than your family member who has become your rival.
As my sister and I embarked on two very distinct chapters of our lives, we realized exactly how different we were, and I learned how to cope with our differences.Ā
When I was still in high school I watched my sister rush aĀ multicultural sorority and saw her fall in love with everything the organization stood for. My parents, seeing how happy she was, encouraged me to do the same once I got to college.Ā They told me it would build my leadership skills and help my character, but I was skeptical.Ā
I started seeing my sister less and less during her pledging process. Whenever I did see her she was dressed in baggy clothes, had her hair in a ponytail, and wasnāt wearing any makeup. I was young and naĆÆve, but I knew what was going on: my sister was being hazed. One night, close to the end of her six-week process, we received a phone call in the middle of the night. It was my sister, and she was crying because a book she was supposed to carry around with her at all times was missing. She was told that she and the other pledges were not going to be initiated because she had lost her book. It turned out that her pledge master had hidden her book in an attempt to play some kind of mind-games with the pledges. After hearing this, I knew for sure that this life wasnāt for me.Ā
Although I knew how happy my sister was once she was initiated, I was stern on the fact that I didnāt want to go through the process she did. I didnāt want anyone telling me what to do, and I especially didnāt want my future sisters playing mind-games with me the night before initiation. Ā Ā Ā
ā¦And then I came to Rutgers, and the fall of my sophomore year, I fell in love. Ā Ā
I found the sisters that accepted me for who I was, and that didnāt need to haze me to see if was right for the organization. It was a social sorority, and it was everything my sister hated about Greek life. Ā Ā
So the fall semester of my sophomore year, as I gushed about how in love I was with everything about my sorority, I was faced with these questions from my sister: Ā Ā
āDo you even know what your letters stand for?ā
āThatās it, you got a bid that easy?āĀ
āDid you even fight for your letters?āĀ
āWhy do you have to pay so much money in dues?āĀ
āDo you even know where that money is going?āĀ
āDo you know what your philanthropy is about?āĀ
āIs that a real philanthropy?āĀ
āDo your values include partying every weekend?āĀ
ā¦You get the point. Ā Ā
I get it, our organizations were almost completely opposite, but somewhere around the 20th condescending remark about my sorority I realized something: if I was happy with theĀ organization I was a part of, why did it matter what my sister had to say about it? Ā Ā
So for the time being, I kept my mouth shut as I heard every snobby remark my sister had to say when I would bring up my sorority to my family and I looked the other way whenever I saw her roll her eyes. Being in two different organizations didnāt make one of us better than the other. We both have different personalities, so it was only natural that we would end up in different places. College wasnāt going to last forever, and I knew that this phase of our relationship would soon fade also. Ā Ā
If there was anything my sisters of my organization taught me it was to be the bigger person. With that being said, I know that I chose the sorority that is best for me.