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TSA Officers, Am I Right?

Stories of my funniest interactions with my favorite airport employees!

Madhurima Das

Jun 15, 2016

Massachusetts Institute of Technology

Business Insider

I have had lots of ridiculous experiences at the airport, so I’ve compiled some of my favorite and funniest TSA officer stories here!

A woman gets flagged down during security for having a large jar of Nutella in her carry-on luggage. I watch as she attempts to flirt her way out of the situation. The TSA officer shakes his head regretfully as he informs her that she must throw away the Nutella since it isn’t allowed on the plane. She begins to walk away, angry her flirting did not yield concrete results. As she’s leaving, the TSA officer calls out behind her, “So, do you come here often?” The woman sarcastically says, “I live here,” then turns on her heel and storms off.

Scene: I'm at the airport wearing my Hogwarts shirt, going through security on the way to China.
TSA officer: Is the train picking you up from Beijing?
Me: (confused) I was going to take a taxi, actually...
TSA officer: (laughing at me) You're not taking the train to Hogwarts, then?
Me: OHHHH! Ha.
TSA officer: That took a while, huh?

The following interactions all happened during the same visit to the airport!

Scene 1

The TSA officer looking at my ID: Hey, it's almost time!

Me: (panicking and thinking he's talking about my flight) Oh really?

Him: Yeah, just over a year now!

Me: Haha, yeah...?

I had no idea what he was referring to and finally realized he was talking about turning 21.

Scene 2

The TSA officer at the luggage scanner: I've been hungry for 54 years now! I get hungry while eating dinner.

Me, silently: Same, though.

Scene 3

The TSA officer behind the body scanner: Another AXO! AXO is my favorite sorority!

Me: Me too!

Him: Ha ha. My sister was an AXO, I guess we're biased. Where at?

Me: MIT!

Him: Oh wow.

The TSA officer checking inside my luggage because of course it got flagged: There's something in here that I need to check, but I think it's food.

Me: It's probably chocolate.

Him: (after opening my suitcase and finding that 60% of it is in fact full of chocolate) Oh, wow…these look yummy!!

I thought about offering him one but figured it might seem like a bribe, so I decided against it.

We'll find out soon what the next episode is in my never-ending airport saga!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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TSA Officers, Am I Right?

Stories of my funniest interactions with my favorite airport employees!

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The Best Lines from the Fab Four

And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

The sun is up, the sky is blue, it's beautiful and so are you

Love is old, love is new, love is all, love is you

There's nowhere you can be that isn't where you're meant to be

Life is very short, and there's no time for fussing and fighting, my friend

He say, "I know you, you know me", One thing I can tell you is you got to be free

Oh please, say to me, You'll let me be your man. And please say to me, You'll let me hold your hand

It was twenty years ago today, Sgt. Pepper taught the band to play. They've been going in and out of style, but they're guaranteed to raise a smile

Living is easy with eyes closed, misunderstanding all you see

Can you hear me? When it rains and shine, it's just a state of mind

Little darling, it's been long cold lonely winter. Little darling, it feels like years since it' s been here. Here comes the sun, Here comes the sun, and I say it's alright

We danced through the night and we held each other tight, and before too long I fell in love with her. Now, I'll never dance with another when I saw her standing there

I love you, I love you, I love you, that's all I want to say

You say you want a revolution. Well you know, we all want to change the world

All the lonely people, where do they all come from. All the lonely people, where do they all belong

Oh, I get by with a little help from my friends

Hey Jude, don't make it bad. Take a sad song and make it better

Yesterday, all my troubles seemed so far away. Now it looks as though they're here to stay. Oh, I believe in yesterday

And when the brokenhearted people, living in the world agree, there will be an answer, let it be.

And anytime you feel the pain, Hey Jude, refrain. Don't carry the world upon your shoulders

I'll give you all I got to give if you say you'll love me too. I may not have a lot to give but what I got I'll give to you. I don't care too much for money. Money can't buy me love

All you need is love, love is all you need

Whisper words of wisdom, let it be

Blackbird singing in the dead of night, Take these broken wings and learn to fly. All your life, You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Though I know I'll never lose affection, for people and things that went before. I know I'll often stop and think about them. In my life, I love you more

Obviously the best superpower.

There have been many lessons learned.

1. The importance of traditions.

2. How to be thankful for family and friends.

3. How to give back.

4. What the word "community" really means.

5. That it isn't about the destination, but the journey.

6. The consequences of making bad choices.

7. To trust people, until you have a reason not to.

8. To be welcoming and accepting of everyone.

9. How to be my own, individual person.

10. How to work for what I want.

11. How to be great at giving directions.

12. How to be humble.

13. To be well-rounded.

14. How to be great at conflict resolution.

15. The beauty of getting outside and exploring.

16. To be prepared for anything.

17. That you don't always have to do it alone.

18. How to be creative.

19. To brush off gossip.

I have never been so thankful to know you.

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

Don't freak out

Email the professor

Attend the first class

Keep attending class

Have a backup plan

Remember that everything works out at the end

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