Whenever someone finds out you're a twin their eyes light up and there are a million questions. They want to know who is older, identical or fraternal, and if you can read each others's minds. Then there is the moment when the other person laments how cool it would be to have a twin. It's not all what you think it is.
Yes, being a twin is a wonderful thing and wouldn't be traded for the world. However, it's not all magic, mind-reading, and rainbows. No, we can't read each others's minds. Sometimes we have the same thoughts or say the same thing, but it is a rarer occurence than you think. In my opinion, those situations are more of a result of having grown up in the same house with similar experiences.
Having a twin makes friendships difficult. We are so often grouped together as a lump sum that we seek out ways to have things that are very much our own. So when we made friendships, it was sometimes hard because we would get along with many of the same people. But sharing friends is hard with your sibling, especially when all you want it to have some space. Then people feel left out and you're mad at the one person who is always there for you.
We are not built in best friends. But my twin is one of the greatest friends out there. It took a long time to truly get along. Bickering was not an uncommon thing between us because we had to share so much of our lives. You can't see it when you're younger, but struggling through milestones together brought us closer. It helped to form a better friendship and bond. Had there been several years between us then it wouldn't have been the same. Yes, understanding could be achieved but not on the same level.
We may have fought and not always liked that we were twins, but I see things a little differently now. The older we got, the less the arguing happened. We started to find our own circle of friends. We went down different paths in our personal lives. It's allowed us the distance that we never had to give us a chance to be so close.
Being a twin isn't magical. I often forget that we are twins because she is just my sister. But I will say that it is a wonderful thing to have someone now to turn to when you are going through something who is right on the same page. We may not be best friends like we are with other people and that's okay. My twin is more than that. She is my womb to tomb. My built in partner in crime. It's not always wonderful or easy, but it is an amazing thing when I really think about it.
