Life is hard. I think everybody knows that much.
The hardest part is wandering through life acting like you know what you're doing when in all reality you haven't got a clue. It seems to me that when talking about the future people always try to glamorize things so you aren't afraid of what's happening next. One day you're 12 years old talking to your older sister about what kind of car you want when you're older and how big your house is going to be. The next thing you know you're 20 years old sitting in a room full of college students who are too high to realize that life is the craziest trip they'll ever be on. You save money and hope you have enough cash every couple weeks just to buy groceries.
I guess they are right about one thing: college students love ramen.
The honest truth about life is that it hurts.
You meet people.
You trust them.
You encourage, help, protect, love and cherish them.
Then you lose them.
When they leave you never quite realize what happened.
Life happened.
These are the types of things they don't warn you about because they don't want you to expect to have your heart broken.
But no one tells you.
What they don't tell you
Nobody tells you that when you're 15 years old, you'll meet people who won't appreciate your beautiful mind just because it's a little different than theirs. Nobody tells you that being emotional and sensitive is a bad thing, one of the worst things you can be. Nobody warns you that when you're 16 and getting bullied at school for not wearing makeup that you'll get terrorized even more when you do. Nobody tells you by the time you're 17 you'll hate your appearance so much that you sit in front of your mirror every day, praying to a God you don't believe in that you could be anyone else. Waking up to a tear-soaked pillowcase becomes a daily routine, and hiding behind a "tough girl" attitude becomes the only fighting chance you have in a high school full of assholes who are determined to tear down your self-confidence even more. Nobody tells you that by 18, you're counting down the days until you graduate and move away from the town that only offers desolation and despair. Nobody tells you that no matter how beautiful you look on prom night, nobody will want to dance with you. They don't tell you that you will spend your 19th birthday alone in your room with a bottle of sleeping pills and a heart full of anger. They don't tell you that on your 20th birthday you'll be laying on the floor in your bathroom crying because nobody cares enough to celebrate with you.
Things they do tell you
I don't know how many times I've heard someone say "high school is the best four years of your life." Well, I hope to God that isn't true, because so far, it was the worst experience I've ever had. They tell you: "just wait until college, everything gets easier."
They're wrong. Nothing gets easier, you're just more alone, more self-conscious and more completely unhappy than you were before.
They don't tell you that you will get stains on your brand new white t-shirt, or be late for work. They don't tell you that the person you like will never like you back and life is all about settling or being alone. They don't warn you that no choice you make is ever the right one because you don't know how the other might have turned out. They don't tell you that you'll have to fight for people's attention because you might not be the type of person that society says is beautiful. Maybe you're a Marilyn Monroe, nobody thinks you're beautiful until you're gone, but my god, are you a legend.
I'll tell you what they aren't wrong about: moving on.
Everyone always says "you'll get over it" or "things will get better with time," and they're completely correct. Humans have the beautiful capability of getting through the most difficult things and that in and of itself is a mystery to me.
Sometimes I wish someone would have warned me about the dangers,
challenges, and heartaches life can bring, because then maybe I wouldn't
have such a high expectation for my mediocre life.
