Trusting God With Your Singleness

Trusting God With Your Singleness

When the world tells you being single means something is wrong with you, fix your eyes on what God is trying to tell you.
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Trusting God in your Singleness Kaleigh K

Despite what this world and our culture tells us, it is okay to be single. Being single is a beautiful time- it is a time for you to solely focus on your relationship with Christ and hear what he is speaking to you without outside distractions. Our culture tells us that we are not worthy if we are not in a relationship with the opposite sex. But, I say (and the Bible), we are in a relationship, all the time, and it happens to be with someone far better than we deserve, Jesus Christ.

We need to rid our minds of what our society says that single people are second best to those married or in a relationship. Guess what? Christ loves us just the same whether we have a significant other or are single. Paul speaks of singleness as a gift. Not being single and content but rather as a state or time of being single. As long as you are single, it’s a gift from God, just as marriage will be God’s gift if you ever receive it. We should receive our situation in life as a gift from God, whether it is singleness or marriage.

Believe it or not, the Bible talks about how there are advantages to being single. Paul discusses these advantages in 1 Corinthians 7. Marriage is hard, it takes work and the bible says to the single person; “you are spared the troubles of marriage”. Life is complicated enough, enjoy this time of being on your own to do what you want, when you want, without worrying about making decisions that will effect someone else. For example, what is on the menu for dinner, where to spend holidays, wanting to hang out with friends on a whim.

Singleness is hard. There are nights and days when Satan creeps loneliness into our hearts and minds. There are countless movies that we love to watch like every Nicholas Sparks movie ever about love, romance, and the beautiful picture it portrays. The holidays are especially tough for being single as we see everyone we know posting cute pictures to reflect their time together during the holiday. But, God hears your struggles just like he did with Adam in the beginning. God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him” in Genesis 2:18. God saw how lonely Adam was in the Garden of Eden and created Eve from his own flesh. Yes, singleness is hard and tough sometimes but, being single isn’t always forever.

Most of you who are currently single will marry one day. There are 8 billion people in the world more than likely one of them will be your soul mate. Someone who you can create memories with and do all the things you longed to do during your time of singleness. But for the others of you who might not marry or find someone on earth, Jesus is our bridegroom. Jesus will return one day and take his bride. Guess who that is?? YOU!! Jesus wants to take you to spend eternity with Him in his perfect new creation. All your pain and suffering on this earth will be gone. God will wipe away every tear you shed during your singleness and will reward you for being patient, and waiting for Him. He will say, “Let us rejoice and be glad and give him glory! The Marriage of the Lamb has come; his Wife has made herself ready. She was given a bridal gown of bright and shining linen. (Revelation 7:17, 19:7)

God says in Matthew 6:33, “but seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” So during this time of singleness I challenge you to be patient, focus on your relationships(with God, friends, and family), and enjoy this time of reflection, and pray for your future spouse. It will all be worth it, I promise!

Cover Image Credit: Google

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I Went To "The Bachelor" Auditions

And here's why you won’t be seeing me on TV.
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It’s finally time to admit my guilty pleasure: I have always been a huge fan of The Bachelor.

I can readily admit that I’ve been a part of Bachelor fantasy leagues, watch parties, solo watching — you name it, I’ve gone the whole nine yards. While I will admit that the show can be incredibly trashy at times, something about it makes me want to watch it that much more. So when I found out that The Bachelor was holding auditions in Houston, I had to investigate.

While I never had the intention of actually auditioning, there was no way I would miss an opportunity to spend some time people watching and check out the filming location of one of my favorite TV shows.

The casting location of The Bachelor, The Downtown Aquarium in Houston, was less than two blocks away from my office. I assumed that I would easily be able to spot the audition line, secretly hoping that the endless line of people would beg the question: what fish could draw THAT big of a crowd?

As I trekked around the tanks full of aquatic creatures in my bright pink dress and heels (feeling somewhat silly for being in such nice clothes in an aquarium and being really proud of myself for somewhat looking the part), I realized that these auditions would be a lot harder to find than I thought.

Finally, I followed the scent of hairspray leading me up the elevator to the third floor of the aquarium.

The doors slid open. I found myself at the end of a large line of 20-something-year-old men and women and I could feel all eyes on me, their next competitor. I watched as one woman pulled out her travel sized hair curler, someone practiced answering interview questions with a companion, and a man (who was definitely a little too old to be the next bachelor) trying out his own pick-up lines on some of the women standing next to him.

I walked to the end of the line (trying to maintain my nonchalant attitude — I don’t want to find love on a TV show). As I looked around, I realized that one woman had not taken her eyes off of me. She batted her fake eyelashes and looked at her friend, mumbling something about the *grumble mumble* “girl in the pink dress.”

I felt a wave of insecurity as I looked down at my body, immediately beginning to recognize the minor flaws in my appearance.

The string hanging off my dress, the bruise on my ankle, the smudge of mascara I was sure I had on the left corner of my eye. I could feel myself begin to sweat. These women were all so gorgeous. Everyone’s hair was perfectly in place, their eyeliner was done flawlessly, and most of them looked like they had just walked off the runway. Obviously, I stuck out like a sore thumb.

I walked over to the couches and sat down. For someone who for the most part spent most of the two hours each Monday night mocking the cast, I was shocked by how much pressure and tension I felt in the room.

A cop, stationed outside the audition room, looked over at me. After a brief explanation that I was just there to watch, he smiled and offered me a tour around the audition space. I watched the lines of beautiful people walk in and out of the space, realizing that each and every one of these contestants to-be was fixated on their own flaws rather than actually worrying about “love.”

Being with all these people, I can see why it’s so easy to get sucked into the fantasy. Reality TV sells because it’s different than real life. And really, what girl wouldn’t like a rose?

Why was I so intimidated by these people? Reality TV is actually the biggest oxymoron. In real life, one person doesn’t get to call all the shots. Every night isn’t going to be in a helicopter looking over the south of France. A real relationship depends on more than the first impression.

The best part of being in a relationship is the reality. The best part about yourself isn’t your high heels. It’s not the perfect dress or the great pick-up lines. It’s being with the person that you can be real with. While I will always be a fan of The Bachelor franchise, this was a nice dose of reality. I think I’ll stick to my cheap sushi dates and getting caught in the rain.

But for anyone who wants to be on The Bachelor, let me just tell you: Your mom was right. There really are a lot of fish in the sea. Or at least at the aquarium.

Cover Image Credit: The Cut

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Calling People Hateful Is Not A Productive Dialogue

Universities have become a breeding ground for intolerance.

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The political climate is rough. I don't enjoy commenting on it because of how controversial it has become. Every once in a while, however, I come across something that rubs me the wrong way.

As I was walking through campus the other day, chalked on the side of a cement wall was a phrase claiming the College Republican club on campus was a hate group. I don't know anything about the person who wrote this statement or anything about the College Republican group on campus, but I do know one thing: this statement is false.

Universities have become a breeding ground for intolerance.

Just because someone has a different opinion from you doesn't mean they are hateful. There is room for disagreement.

A psychology professor of mine once said something that impacted my perspective toward both political parties: "Both sides think they're right, but both sides can't be right." Both sides make decisions based on what they think is right. A person's opinion is not "wrong" if it differs from yours. It's just different.

It's important to recognize that people won't always agree with you, and that's okay. That doesn't give you the right to call them mean or hateful. It allows an entrance into discussion. Besides, if you want to persuade someone that your belief is more accurate, name calling won't get you anywhere. It will only cause the other person to view you as inconsiderate and unwilling to understand.

How can you convince someone to believe you when you won't listen to their perspective? How can you expect people to listen to you when you won't do the same in return? Not only is it important to recognize a person's beliefs, it's important to understand why they believe what they do.

In order for people to engage in productive dialogue, both sides need to listen to each other and respect each other. Tossing labels around progresses nowhere and doesn't benefit anyone.

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