It's been a month since this nation chose Donald Trump to captain the ship for the next four years. I think most of us can agree that this was a poor decision, but that doesn't matter. Whether we like it or not, all of us are getting a Donald Trump regime for Christmas.
What could we have done so wrong that we now deserve this? Once, Santa Claus delivered coal to bad children, but this year, S.C. is dumping bigmouth racists in our stockings (hung over the fireplace with care). Last week, I wrote about a log that shat presents in Catalonia. I can just picture the tio de nadal pooping out a Trump; after all, Trump's hair kind of looks like the poop emoji.
Our unwanted Christmas present has already picked his henchmen for his administration, and it's looking mighty grim. He's got the co-founder of the WWE heading the Small Business Association and a known climate change denier, Scott Pruitt heading the EPA. Hopefully, I don't have to tell you why these two picks in particular suck. This whole business reminds me of how elementary school hall monitors would pick their buddies to help gang up on other kids.
Either way, it looks like we'll have to buckle ourselves in and reluctantly await the follies our Christmas gift will bring, because we are indeed getting a Trump for Christmas, make no mistake. And sadly, your parents can't just save the receipt and return the unwanted item to the store in this situation; we are stuck (unless the recount thing occurs). All we can do is wait the way we used to wait for Christmas...except for four years not 25 days.
