You like being around a lot of people....and feel comfortable? Can't Relate. I hate talking to people in group settings. This happened so long ago I can't even remember when I first started to feel uncomfortable. I literally can be around people who love me and still feel like there is a foot in my mouth. This scared awkward feeling ultimately has affected my future as far as well everything. I make it sound very bad but I am working through it.
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Growing up I can honestly say I was an open kid. I love people and I love making new friends. Being the sweet person I am there was one problem, not everyone was like me. I quickly realized children, and in the case, young "adults" are rude too. If I had to pinpoint a reason why and how I became socially awkward I would have to point the finger at bullying. Bullying is the foundation of all problems of growing teens. This isn't a proven fact but if you ask me, I would say A LOT of people stops chasing their dreams because of opinions of others. How are you suppose to be comfortable going something new and exciting if your worried about what people may say? Exactly, you can't. I literally can to this day remember every negative encounter I had in high school. They hit me at the worst times and I just want to curl up into a ball. I know you should only think positive but it's hard sometimes when your everyday activities remind you of the past.
Yes, I know I preach about not caring about what other say but dang it sometimes its hard! I literally can't have simple conversations without feeling like I just a burden. My awkwardness goes so far down I have problems ending conversations without walking away awkwardly. The funnier part is no one notices it until I say tell them. One day I just said no more! I couldn't take not making long lasting relationships and true friendship because of my problem. I vowed for my Senior year I would push myself not to be awkward anymore. Thankfully I was blessed with job that forced me to do just that.
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My moral of this truth is life is hard but you can fight through it. I'm still socially awkward but I found ways to work through it. I currently hold a job that requires me to make daily interactions with new people. It has helped a lot with small talk and my eye contact. Don't let anything hold you back at the end of the day. There is always a way to fight something that is taking a hold of your daily life.
