A lot of us would like to say we have some pretty funny stories about how crappy our first cars were. Although I am extremely biased, I think I may be able to persuade you into agreeing my car was actually the worst in around 500 words.
Let's start off with the description: 1993 burgandy Cutlass Oldsmobile Supreme with faux velour interior.
BURGUNDY.
FAUX. VELOUR. INTERIOR.
... Need I say more?
I came to inherit this car after four generations of my family driving it. My great-grandma (I have put this in bold for emphasis), my grandparents, my mom, my sister, and last but not least I was the final one to drive it before we were forced to sell it for scrap metal (yes that actually happens) my freshman year of college.
Throughout the different generations, it has manifested many names. When my mom drove it we mainly called it "the loser cruiser". When my sister drove it she recalls, "Indigo rush, Bertha, Murial, Red Velvet". While I drove it, I called the car "Tyrone". None of these names make sense--I am very aware of that.
I grew up in an affluent area on the east side of Michigan and lets just say I got a lot of stares as I would drive by other people in their BMW's, Mercedes, Cadillacs, and the every High School girl's car--a Jeep Liberty. I also believe the police in my town thought I was a criminal due to the fact that they would pretty much follow me almost every day. This also may have been because you could hear my car from approximately 15 miles away (this was because my sister drove over a log at a swim club parking lot and put a gaping hole in the muffler).
My many near-death experiences driving Tyrone have acted as great conversation starters. One specific occurrence, which I remember vividly, was the time my powering steering fluid hose completely fell apart and my steering wheel, according to the mechanics, was about to fall off. At the time, I was in my High School's parking lot and drove over the front lawn. This was just one of many, many instances.
While there were countless of other things that went wrong with Tyrone, for the sake of saving you time, I will provide you with a list:
1. The steering wheel would occasionally smoke.
2. There was no side-view mirror on the passenger side.
3. A piece of metal would hold my gas cap together.
4. There was no gas gage.
5. While most people scrape the outside of their car when it's icy, I HAD TO SCRAPE THE INSIDE AS WELL ... I'll give you a moment to think about that one.
5. There were no rear brakes for a year and a half.
6. Both front doors wouldn't open from the outside.
7. There were holes in the ceiling so when it would flood and we had to drill holes in the ground of the car so the water could drain out.
9. I once had to take it in and the mechanics told me in order to wake up their workers in the morning they would turn on my car.
While these are just some of the few things that went wrong with my car, we honestly had a good run together. We will never forget you.
*Side note: I would also like to add I won best car of 2013. It was clearly a complete joke.




















