Help, I Love Trashy Young Adult Novels

Help, I Love Trashy Young Adult Novels

And I don't really want to get up.
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Bright colors, big letters, a title that only shows a bare minimum of the subject matter, maybe a close-up shot of a conventionally attractive girl or the profile of a young man. The beginning of a book like all the rest -- a classic, cheesy young adult fiction novel.

I absolutely love trashy Y.A. romance novels... Not the kind of thing that would make grandma blush just by the title and shirtless Fabio on the cover, but the kind of book with the Brooding Hero and his Manic Pixie Dream Girl and horribly long descriptions of her auburn waves and his smoldering smirk. I can absolutely acknowledge their faults; their sometimes unlikely plot lines, problematic side characters, and lack of main characters with more than one dimension or any variation from convention.

I love their similar plot lines, and for the adventure novels, the utterly useless romantic interests that tear the heroine from her path to destroy the unyielding tyrant, all for one (usually underwhelming) kiss. Not all of these novels are bad, and of course everyone is allowed an opinion on them. For me, they’re like pop music: chewed-up and missing flavor, but still palatable. Their meaning is often just as chewed up -- that everyone is special, you have some great strength deep inside, and that finding a boy (or girl) to be a catalyst is all you need.

I love how easy to read they are, how simple the transition from a real life with rules to one where teenagers go running off at midnight is, and how easy the characters can relate to real life, despite their fantastic lifestyles. Naturally, many are hard off -- the underdog is a common trope to be found too, with the likes of Katniss Everdeen ("The Hunger Games"), Charlie ("The Perks of Being a Wallflower") and Hazel Lancaster ("The Fault in Our Stars"). These characters are so effective because we can't help but root for them; we can't help but fall for them, over and over.



Their repetitive nature makes them easier to swallow, makes them easier to get through. I'm a fast reader, but I can chug through a 300-page Y.A. novel in less than a day. Even faster, if there is any amount of suspense. There's a good reason books like these are so successful, and it has everything to do with their common themes. A few authors figured out how to get into the head of a 14-year-old reading a book, and no one looked back. Most of the time, the books aren't teaching much -- aren't really a prize -- but they're still good fun, and are therefore worth reading.

So I'll keep reading these Y.A. post-apocalyptic, one-true-savior romance novels, and honestly, you should too. Everyone needs an easy escape from reality.

Cover Image Credit: http://collider.com/perks-of-being-a-wallflower-images/

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35 Major Life Facts According To Nick Miller

"All booze is good booze, unless it's weak booze."
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Fact: If you watch "New Girl," you love Nick Miller.

You can't help it. He's an adorable, lovable mess of a man and you look forward to seeing him and his shenanigans each week. While living the infamous and incomparable life of Nick Miller, and obviously Julius Pepperwood— he has learned many valuable laws of the land. And, although Nick refuses to learn anything from anyone besides his mysterious, old Asian friend Tran, he does have a few lessons he'd like to teach us.

Here are 35 facts of life according to 'Nick Milla Nick Milla':

1. Drinking keeps you healthy.

"I'm not gonna get sick. No germ can live in a body that is 65% beer."

2. Dinosaurs never existed.

"I don't believe dinosaurs existed. I've seen the science. I don't believe it."


3. A paper bag is a bank.

"A bank is just a paper bag but with fancier walls."


4. Having sex is similar to delivering mail.

"I'm like a mailman, except instead of mail it's hot sex that I deliver."

5. Moonwalking is a foolproof way to get out of any awkward situation.

Jess (about Nick): "Now he won't even talk to me. I saw him this morning and he just panic moonwalked away from me. He does that sometimes."

6. Using a movie reference is also a great way.

Cece: "Come on, get up!"

Nick: "No, I don't dance. I'm from that town in "Footloose."

7. There's no reason to wash towels.

Nick: "I don’t wash the towel. The towel washes me. Who washes a towel?"

Schmidt: "You never wash your towel?"

Nick: "What am I gonna do? Wash the shower next? Wash a bar of soap?"

8. Exes are meant to be avoided at all costs (especially if/unless they're Caroline)

"I don't deal with exes, they're part of the past. You burn them swiftly and you give their ashes to Poseidon."

9. IKEA furniture is not as intimidating as it looks.

"I'm building you the dresser. I love this stuff. It's like high-stakes LEGOs."

10. You don't need forks if you have hands.

Jess: "That's gross. Get a fork, man."

Nick: "I got two perfectly good forks at the end of my arms!"

11. Sex has a very specific definition.


"It's not sex until you put the straw in the coconut."

12. Doors are frustrating.

"I will push if I want to push! Come on! I hate doors!"

13. All booze is good booze.

"Can I get an alcohol?"

14. ...unless it's weak booze.

"Schmidt, that is melon flavored liquor! That is 4-proof! That is safe to drink while you're pregnant!"

15. Writers are like pregnant women.

Jess: "You know what that sound is? It's the sound of an empty uterus."

Nick: "I can top that easily. I'm having a hard time with my zombie novel."

Jess: "Are you really comparing a zombie novel to my ability to create life?"

Nick: "I'm a writer, Jess. We create life."

16. All bets must be honored.

"There is something serious I have to tell you about the future. The name of my first-born child needs to be Reginald VelJohnson. I lost a bet to Schmidt."

17. Adele's voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus.

"Adele is amazing."

18. Beyoncé is extremely trustworthy.

"I'd trust Beyoncé with my life. We be all night."

19. Fish, on the other hand, are not.


“Absolutely not. You know I don’t trust fish! They breathe water. That's crazy!"

20. Bar mitzvahs are terrifying.

Schmidt: "It's a bar mitzvah!"

Nick: "I am NOT watching a kid get circumcised!"

21. ...so are blueberries.

Jess: "So far, Nick Miller's list of fears is sharks, tap water, real relationships..."

Nick: "And blueberries."

22. Take your time with difficult decisions. Don't be rash.


Jess: "You care about your burritos more than my children, Nick?"

Nick: "You're putting me in a tough spot!"

23. Getting into shape is not easy.

"I mean, I’m not doing squats or anything. I’m trying to eat less donuts."

24. We aren't meant to talk about our feelings.

"If we needed to talk about feelings, they would be called talkings."


25. We're all a little bit too hard on ourselves.

"The enemy is the inner me."

26. Freezing your underwear is a good way to cool off.


"Trust me, I'm wearing frozen underpants right now and I feel amazing. I'm gonna grab some old underpants and put a pair into the freezer for each of you."

27. Public nudity is normal.

"Everbody has been flashed countless times."

28. Alcohol is a cure-all.


"You treat an outside wound with rubbing alcohol. You treat an inside wound with drinking alcohol."

29. Horses are aliens.

"I believe horses are from outer-space."


30. Turtles should actually be called 'shell-beavers.'

Jess: "He calls turtles 'shell-beavers."

Nick: "Well, that's what they should be called."

31. Trench coats are hot.


"This coat has clean lines and pockets that don't quit, and it has room for your hips. And, when I wear it, I feel hot to trot!"


32. Sparkles are too.

"Now, my final bit of advice, and don't get sensitive on this, but you've got to change that top it's terrible and you've got to throw sparkles on. Sparkles are in. SPARKLES ARE IN."

33. Introspection can lead to a deeper knowing of oneself.

"I'm not convinced I know how to read. I've just memorized a lot of words."


34. It's important to live in the moment.

"I know this isn't gonna end well but the middle part is gonna be awesome."


35. Drinking makes you cooler.

Jess: "Drinking to be cool, Nick? That's not a real thing."

Nick: "That's the only thing in the world I know to be true."

Cover Image Credit: Hollywood Reporter

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Toulouse Grande, Ari's Dog, Stole The Spotlight In The 'thank u, next' Music Video

Any dog other than Toulouse Grande? Thank you, next!

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For those of you who don't know (or who are jumping on the Ariana Grande train just now), Toulouse is one of Ariana's many dogs. He's appeared in a few other music videos, like 'Right There' and 'No Tears Left To Cry'. However, his cameo was most prominent in her latest music video for 'thank u, next', which, by the way, broke YouTube records.

1. He's first seen rolling up with Ari, dressed as Elle Woods from Legally Blonde

Hannah Lux Davis

Toulouse called shotgun.

2. Toulouse stars as Bruiser Woods, Elle's sidekick

Hannah Lux Davis

Name a more iconic duo.

3. He's featured in some close-ups

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Every other dog on the planet is QUAKING in their boots.

4. Toulouse has no fear of the spotlight with his mommy by his side

Hannah Lux Davis

Nerves? Thank you, next.

5. He even wears his own custom swimsuit 

Hannah Lux Davis

He's living his best life.

6. How could you forget his studded collar?

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This collar probably costs more than my car.

7. He is completely unfazed by the cameras 

Alfredo Flores

He was BORN for showbiz.

8. At one point he literally watches himself on TV

Hannah Lux Davis

An absolute ICON.

9. He was even seen being pampered in behind the scenes footage

Alfredo Flores

Sadly, this scene didn't make it to the actual music video.

10. He got all the affection in between takes

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Only the best smooches for Toulouse.

11. Toulouse was an absolute spotlight-stealer

Hannah Lux Davis

He is killing it.

12. Keep living your best life, Toulouse!

Hannah Lux Davis

We'll keep living vicariously through you.

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