Is it a trend, a phase or an actual way of life for some people? Society questions so many aspects of people’s everyday life as it is, why must the comfort of one’s identity be questioned as well? Being a transgender isn’t something one can just change because it’s not “The Norm”. It’s not as simple as changing into your pajamas after a long day at the office or picking up the remote control because you don’t like the program that’s on. Trying to change a person’s gender identity is no more successful than trying to change a person’s sexual orientation….IT DOES NOT WORK! Coming out as gay or bi-sexual to your family, friends, and society is tough enough on the individual, now imagine changing your physical appearance to fit your inner being as well. Transgender does not mean you like to dress up in the opposite sex’s clothes at some random office costume party, this is a way of life. Transgender is a term used to describe people whose gender identity differs from the sex the doctor marked on their birth certificate. Gender identity is a person’s internal, personal sense of being a man or woman. For trans-gendered people, the sex they were assigned at birth and their own internal gender identity do not match. I personally could care less how an individual chooses to live their life or how they decide to dress, act, speak or whom they decide to date.

The reason this topic means a great deal to me and the reason I am writing about it now is that it is relevant to so many of us, especially me. I have a younger sibling who has recently come out as Transgender. I won’t specifically mention a name, so we’ll refer to him as “X”. “X” was born a female which obviously made “X” my sister from birth until recently. “X” now has become my brother. Maybe all the anatomy of “X” is the same as it was at birth but to him, he is not female and doesn’t relate on the inside as a female. This obviously is a confusing transition for myself and my family, and definitely is a major adjustment. Just think for one second, if it’s difficult for us, how difficult is it for the individual themselves to even try to explain or portray this to society?

Lesbian, Gay or Bi-Sexual is a sexual orientation and Transgender is an identity, just to clarify that. Sexual orientation describes a person’s physical, romantic and/or emotional attraction to another person. Gender identity describes a person’s internal personal sense of being a man or woman. It all comes down to your own sense of self. Just because they are transgender does not mean they are gay or lesbian. There are many transgender people who are straight believe it or not.

For example, if a person transitions from male to female and is attracted solely to male identify as a straight female, not a gay male. A person who transitions from female to male but find themselves still attracted to solely men would identify as a gay male. I know it seems odd or even confusing because of all the anatomy of the human body, but it’s not about what’s under the clothing of a transgender person which defines their sexual orientation, it’s their identity and how the present themselves physically.

So my sibling “X” wouldn’t be identified as a lesbian anymore but as a straight male. “X” is a transitioning female to male who is solely attracted to females, hmmm….I learned something new like I’m sure some of you just did too.

I love my younger sibling regardless of his identity. He could be ten feet tall and have a Quasimodo figure and my love for him would never change. I would learn to adjust and carry a six-foot ladder around so no matter what I’d be his equal and not make him an outcast. I believe it’s time society have the same outlook toward each and every individual who decide to step outside the box of what we consider “The Norm” and learn to embrace them for the courage it takes to be themselves.