Tough love is defined in the Merriam-Webster dictionary as love or concern that is expressed in a strict way especially to make someone behave responsibly.
Of course, it can always be very difficult to listen to things that you didn't want to hear in the first place, especially when it comes from a loved one. It can also be very hard as a friend to try and help out, knowing that the outcome can be risky. However, sometimes the only person who is able to try and help someone to make a change is a close friend, and sometimes close friends or family are the only people who recognize a bad or destructive behavior in a person.
Tough love is always risky because the person who needs it isn't guaranteed to take what you say with the knowledge that you are just trying to help them because you love them. They can often be hurt and feel betrayed because they feel like you left their team and that you are pitted against them. Often the giver will feel hurt, too. It is so incredibly challenging to help a friend who is struggling. You don't want to upset them with what you need to say, and you certainly don't want to lose that friend forever if they take your words too harshly. What is important to know is that they will probably spend some time thinking about what was said and discussed, and they will hopefully realize that you were right in giving them some tough love, and hopefully they will do something to make a change.
In my opinion, love isn't real if it is all butterflies and rainbows. Real love means telling a loved one when they are wrong, that they need to make a change, or pointing them in the right direction when they need more help than you can offer them. Letting something go that shouldn't be isn't love, and ignoring issues also isn't love. Love is a challenge and not something that should be taken for granted. Love and relationships are work, and hard work, at that. Real love includes tough love.
Now, I'm not saying in this article to call your best friend right now and tell them everything that they do that bothers you, in fact, that isn't what I'm saying at all. If you notice that a loved one isn't himself or herself lately or if they are getting themselves into emotional or physical trouble in their head or in their actions, that is when they need your tough love.
Listen when someone is giving you tough love, and be careful when giving it. What everybody needs to remember in the end is that it is called tough love for a reason.
