Halloween is a time to let loose. Specifically, to let your waistline loose. And, of course, everyone loves candy but not everyone loves the same candy. While some people prefer the sour pucker of a Warhead, others prefer the smooth, creaminess of a classic Hershey's chocolate bar.
1. Skittles
Skittles are superior because you're actually tasting the rainbow. Each one is like a little nugget of joy. But really, they're kind of like crack. Once you have a handful, you can't not have another. Hence why they reign supreme.
2. M&Ms
M&Ms are like the sweet, chocolate version of Skittles. They're both tiny, easy to pop into your gullet, and are easily accessible in the sense that you can gorge on them without feeling like too much of a fat-ass.
3. Reese's
For those of you with peanut allergies, you suck. You'll never understand the beauty that is engulfing a peanut butter cup in one inhalation. These things are amazing, but tend to melt easy, which kinda sucks if you're too lazy to bring one to your mouth for too long. The hard candy shell on M&M's and Skittles kind of saves you from dealing with that for at least a couple minutes. Right?
4. Snickers
Okay, this bar has like, four layers, for you complex hipster dipster types. It's got peanuts, duh. Also chocolate, duh. But it also has caramel and I am pretty sure nougat. That's pretty cool. Can't beat something with that much going on, but also, why are they trying so hard? Sounds like they're attempting to impress when really they should just chill out.
5. 3 Musketeers
Okay, a lot of people hate these shits, but they're actually pretty good. They're creamy and you can't beat that because there aren't that many candies that are solely creamy. I mean, you have creamy and crunchy, but this bars purpose is solely to make your mouth feel like it's coated in sugar. That kind of sucks but the taste is pretty baller.
6. KitKats
These little bitches are delicious. I'd put them at number one, but they're also kind of a cookie, so it's less of a candy to me. Plus when you think of candy, you don't actually think of KitKat first. You think of the previous candies. So while KitKats are probably the best tasting, ask yourself: are they really the best HALLOWEEN candy? No. They're the best year round candy. Moving on.
7. Sour Patch Kids
They're sweet, they're sour, and then they're gone. That's it. I mean they taste good while you have them, but I can pop these things like Tic-Tacs, and we all know Tic-Tacs aren't candy, so what the hell are Sour Patch Kids? They ain't no gummy vitamins, I'll tell you that, but sometimes they taste like them if you eat more than 30 in one sitting. Next.
8. Candy Corn
Disgusting. I don't even want to hear it. If you like these, Halloween is cancelled for you.
Good luck trick or treating this year! If you can't find any candy, there's probably a special on wine.
