It's that very first thought of the day that gets you. The one that hits before you even move a single muscle. Today is going to suck.
The only reason you drag yourself out of bed is that you fear the consequences of avoiding your responsibilities more than the effort it will take to complete them. The simplest of tasks seem so much harder than they are because of how much you have to move. It's only fitting to spill your coffee, not feel confident in your appearance for the day, and be running late when you feel like this. It's just one thing after another, right?
You do what you need to do for the day, but you end up mad at yourself for putting out what felt like the bare minimum. You turn to your phone for some mindless scrolling for a while, but you're greeted with an abundance of messages and emails to reply to. The amount is overwhelming, so you choose to let them sit unread even though the notification bubbles drive you crazy.
You try not to stare at the clock because you know it will make time feel like it's going even slower than it already is, but you can't help it because all you want to do is be at home in your bed. Your body feels heavy and it's so difficult to hold everything upright, yet you still dream of all the productive things you'll do when you get home. The hope has to count for something, right?
The end of the day has arrived and it's finally time to head home. You relax on your bed telling yourself that it's only for ten minutes of rest before you wrap things up. You know you should eat a proper dinner, but you can't even fathom what to make and you're not that hungry anyways. Minutes turn to hours and still nothing is complete; before you know it, your eyes have drifted shut.
It's three in the morning when you wake up. In a panic, you bolt upright to put the finishing touches (or paragraphs or pages) on that essay due at 9:00 am and stumble into the shower hoping that you're not waking up anyone else just because you have bad habits you still haven't fixed. Why can't you just get it together? When you finally turn off all the lights and flop into bed exhausted, you only get average two more hours of sleep before you have to wake up and do it all over again.
It's the very first thought that gets you. The one that hits before you even move a single muscle. Today is going to suck again.
You drag yourself out of bed again and go through the motions of getting yourself ready for the world. Maybe you're still feeling a bit cruddy, but you find yourself appreciating how your coffee tastes today. The outfit you have on isn't your favorite, but you still feel good in it. You're bopping along to some music and even busting a few dance moves as you head out the door with just enough time to get to your destination without rushing.
Life sucks; no one is ever going to deny that. Some days are going to be a hell of a lot harder than others, but you have to keep forging ahead. You never know if tomorrow will turn out better and what great things the future has in store for you.
Don't believe me? Think back to a time where you laughed so hard that your sides hurt. A time where you felt so happy that you felt all warm inside and couldn't contain your gleeful smile. A time where you were so relaxed that you thought to yourself "I don't want to be anywhere else but here."
Personally, I can't wait to have more of those moments and I would be heartbroken to miss out on them. School is stressful, but I'm studying what I love. Sometimes I feel lonely, but I know I'll be spending more time with my family and friends before I know it. Sometimes I'm down in the dumps and having a hard time getting out, but I know my life has more in store for me and I'm going to thrive again.
It's the very first thought that gets to you. The one that hits before you even move a single muscle. Today will be better.
