Hi,
I know you, don't I? You wear your heart on your sleeve. You open up to everyone you meet. And no matter how much you hurt, you still trust that next time you won't. Well, I'm here to tell you that even though you've struggled with hating this about yourself, you should love it. There's a bravery in being sweet when the world tries so hard to make you bitter. You possess a characteristic that very few do. You always try again. No matter how many dark nights you have, you always rise with the sun.
Believe me, I know how much it hurts. It hurts to be taken advantage of, which you often are. It hurts to open up so much when your weaknesses are used against you. But you can't help it. It's not really possible for you to build a guard. It's in your nature to hold onto the hope that people are kind. You believe that those few good people you find make up for all those who have done you wrong. There's a beauty in that. In being that vulnerable. You possess a courage some will never know.
I once stumbled across a quote by Nikka Ursula that read: "For a star to be born, there is one thing that must happen: a gaseous nebula must collapse. So collapse. Crumble. This is not your destruction. This is your birth." I believe it is so important to break. Every time you do, there is an opportunity to rise stronger.
On your days when you wish you could be more self-preserving, be thankful for the things you have felt that so many have never been able to feel. You have opened your world to both the destructive and the nurturing, but you've been made wiser by each.
Don't loathe your kindness. The world is tough, but you've got thick skin. Embrace the fact that each time you're hurt, you choose to love again. Admire yourself for having a faith in humanity that most people have lost. Be the one who inspires those around you to continue trusting. Inspire them to be free.
"Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness." Kurt Vonnegut.
With all my love,
Caitlin
