7 Reasons Or Situations You Might Find Yourself Friendzoning Others

7 Reasons Or Situations You Might Find Yourself Friendzoning Others

A message to those of us who quickly decide if someone is a friend or potentially something more.

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Everyone once in a while comes across a particular person who may have interest in them, but would rather prefer to be friends with them rather than something more. But, when that occurs, is it always the wisest decision to classify them as just friends? How do you know?

Here are 7 reasons why you may friendzone someone.

1. You Feel It Is Easier To Just Be Friends

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You may feel that being friends is less stressful and less time-consuming, but our friends should be almost as important as our romantic relationships. In other words, being friends should not be considered a consolation prize. So, friendzoning someone does not automatically make the nature of the relationship change.

2. Afraid Of The Unknown

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You may be inclined to just be friends and not something more, because you feel that it may not work out that way. That feeling is a normal one. It is not uncommon to have a few reservations before forming a nonplatonic relationship, which is why most people do not get married at first sight. Things take time. Things could very well work out, but if you unilaterally friendzone someone, you will never know.

3. They Do Not Fit The Mold

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You may actually like this person a bit more than just a friend, but because they do not necessarily fit your expectations for a partner, you label them as just a friend. Expectations are very tricky, because it may exemplify your values, but limit you in scope. You may not like pickles, and are reluctant to try relish. But, finally one day you try relish, and love it. Sometimes you do not know if you like something or someone, until you try.

4. You Do Not Feel Ready

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You may not feel ready to jump into a nonplatonic relationship at the time, so positioning someone as just a friend may be a way of protecting yourself. No one should do anything they do not feel ready to do. But, sometimes, when we wait, we miss out. If, for example, you are still dealing with the fallout of a break-up, you may not want to get involved with anyone else right now. You may be closing yourself off, while the person who could very well make you happy long-term begins to retreat further away. And, often times, a part of you never fully gets over that previous breakup. So, waiting, can be forever.

5. They Do Not Seem Ready

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Sometimes we friendzone someone because we do not think they are ready to be involved in something more. But, people should never invest in assumptions. If there is an open dialogue and constant communication, you and the other person should know where you stand. Answering your own questions in your head can sometimes lead to a game of chicken. You may friendzone them because you do not think they are ready, they may friendzone you because they think you are not ready. Maybe you should know more about the other, before you decide.

6. You Have Experienced It

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If you have been friendzoned several times, you may find it normal to friendzone others. Sometimes, people need an ego boost, and being able to keep someone who they know who likes them at arm-length, seems to make them feel better. But, that is often very inconsiderate and could be hurtful to that person. Remember how you felt when it happened to you.

7. You Do Not Know What You Want.

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You may decide that a particular person should just be a friend, because you are not sure what you want. Ambivalence is more pervasive than not. A lot of people do know what they want, so it is important to be open-minded. When confronted in a situation where you feel you need to decide about a particular person, be mindful of your ambivalence, and take that into account when deciding.

Think about this all.

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Every Time I See A College Tour Group Walk By I Just Want to Scream 'It's a TRAAAPP!'

The tour guide is good - they're just a liar.
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It's officially that time of year - anywhere you walk on campus, there's bound to be a gaggle of parents and befuddled high school students winding their way through building after building. In front of them stands an overenthusiastic tour guide, spouting off statistics about the school so fast they'll make your head spin.

Unfortunately, what the tour guide says doesn't exactly line up with what goes on at the school. Oh, the things we students wish we could shout out to the parents as they pass by.

1. "You'll get sick of the dining!"

It may look like there's something new to eat every single day, but by the end of the semester, you'll be sick of everything except the things closest at home.

2. "I'm only here for the free t-shirts!"

Seriously.

3. "IT'S A TRAP!"

Seriously, part two. You get two of three things: a social life, sleep, or good grades. Whoever said you could have all three is lying.

4. "Welcome to the real world, suckers!"

It's got confrontation, taking care of yourself, and formal emails. (Which, of course, your professor will respond with 'k thnx bai' sent from their iPhone.)

5. "Say goodbye to sleep!"

There are three types of people on campus: tea drinkers, coffee drinkers, and people with energy drinks running through their veins.

6. "THE MODEL DORM IS A LIE!"

Check all of your housing options before you move in. The dorm they're showing you might be the worst housing area on campus.

7. "THE FINANCIAL AID IS A LIE!"

You're getting squat. Free tuition? Try the tune of $13k a year. Or more. Depending.

8. "The library is NOT the best study place."

Depending on your major, there are several places for you to study that aren't the library.

9. "The health center sucks!"

True fact: word through the grapevine is that someone once got antibiotics for a sprained ankle.You may as well sell that leg on the black market to cover the costs.

10. "Believe the roommate horror stories!"

All random roommates are horrible unless proven otherwise. (But be wary of everyone.)

11. "SI (student instructor) sessions are useless."

You will learn nothing . Chances are you'll end up correcting the instructor.

12. "The freshman fifteen is optional."

Some people don't gain it at all, and some people really gain it. It's up to you.

13. "You'll need a car!!"

If, for some reason you can't pay for the overpriced parking pass, find a friend who can.

14. "Hookup culture is real!"

But it's not for everyone. Just because everyone is doing it doesn't mean you have to.

15. "Campus jobs are a myth!"

Campus job? What's a campus job? Do you have work-study? No? No job for you. Have you tried the local coffee shop?

Cover Image Credit: Flickr

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