On March 13th, I left Texas Tech University to go back home for my spring break. I didn't know that would be the last day I stepped foot into a classroom my junior year. I didn't know that my summer plans were finally set only to be wiped away. I didn't know that the highest items in demand would be toilet paper, and hand sanitizer. I didn't know...that half of America was about to be hit with an excruciating wave of fear.

You see...

It started off slowly.

Here and there, the people in charge- the people who hold power to bring us the information, mentioned it. They spoke of it in the passing. We heard whispers on the street and caught on to them as quickly as we let them go, only to resume our daily lives. We indulged in limitless entertainment of all kinds. There were boundless forms of freedom that we underappreciated: the freedom to laugh with friends around the table at your favorite restaurant, to kiss your loved one, to sit in the stands of your favorite sports team, to share a beverage, to gather in the masses on Sunday mornings...

Because you see, everything…. was normal. And then, just as quickly as normal had been, even more quickly it ceased. It is like one day we just woke up, and the world was on lockdown.

Normal seemed to strip itself away piece by piece until the world became noticeably naked. Naked of the things we used to cover ourselves up with day by day. Those who held the power to talk about anything choose to talk about one thing. Restaurants no longer light up the streets with their usual chatty charisma, but instead the buildings sat barren. No longer do we have the luxury of going to our favorite coffee shop in our favorite spot to read a good book. No longer will we get old fashioned, in person laughs and giggles with our closest mates. And that is not all- the biggest god in America was stripped away and we have gone insane with finding other forms of time occupancy: sports entertainment. These games and players were held on a pedestal, groomed and worshipped, and now that it is gone, what will the people worship? What will we let consume us now? What will we turn our attention to?

Everything….is gone.

Our distractions are gone.

Our 'gods' are gone.

Our 'cemented' life has crumbled to pieces.

So maybe...just maybe, let's think about this.

Would you

Sit here

And ponder

With me

Just a little bit?

Maybe, just maybe...there is a bigger reason to all of this. Maybe there is someone calling our name. Someone telling us to stop watching your dang show and wake up. Wake up to the world around you. Wake up to what is happening. WAKE UP and hear me speaking to you. Someone saying to us,

"Will you listen to me, now…. Can you HEAR me now? Now that your distractions and your "gods" are gone, will you get still enough to hear my voice, beloved?"

I want to listen. I want to cast my anxieties and my fears and the chaotic cares of the physical world and my mind to the ground and sit there....naked. I want to cast off the things I am SO USED to trying to fill my cup up with. Surely, there is more than this. Surely, there is something greater....waiting in the midst of this unprecedented pandemic.

So, I choose growth. I choose joy. I choose.....saying yes. I choose the uncomfortable questions. I choose putting down my expectations and seeking truth with and heart open that's ready to receive. I want.... the real thing. I want the truth.

I will not lose hope.

I will not let fear consume me.

I will not fold myself into a victim.

I will use this time in whatever way I can to become…. better...to see...clearer. I will encourage others. I will let my thoughts run their course and hopefully transfer them into the world in a tangible way. I will love others more deeply and intentionally than I ever have. I will ask the hard questions to an invisible God that is somehow...becoming more real to me than anything I have ever 'seen' with my bodily eyes. I will trust that this is not a 'coincidence' and I will trust that goodness can and will come out of what was intended for evil.

To this...I stand in the quiet, and this is what I hear.

"I am calling my bride, my people, to wake up. I am calling them into greater intimacy with me. I am calling them to know me. To love me. The real me. I am calling them into relationship, not religion. I want to know my people. I want them to love me. I am equipping them for what is coming, Would you let me into the deeper parts of your heart? Would you let me heal you from your burdens? Would you take my hand and come join this marvelous dance with me? Give me the deeper parts of you. I am equipping you for more. I am showing you how to have true life."

I want to join my Jesus on this beautiful dance. I want to be where He is. I want to go where He goes. Would you come with me?