Gosh, I don't even know where to begin. I've typed and retyped this, because no words seem to sum up how awesome it is to have someone be my parent by choice. And not any someone: You.
You have made more of an impact on my life than I have ever admitted. I mean, of course I wouldn't admit it back in my years of teenage fury. But even now, I know I forget to remember that you didn't have to step up the way you have -- the way you still do. And I probably do that because, in reality, you are as much of a parent to me as my biological parents are.
I know it hasn't been easy, and I know it also wasn't "ideal". Walking in and beginning a marriage as you simultaneously raise your children AND raise a child that isn't yours by blood -- and not just any child, but one that's been a damn handful -- probably wasn't what you had in mind. But you did it, you walked in and you restored something that had been shaken by divorce. You bring something so necessary into our family. Especially now, as I become a "real" adult (don't laugh) with a little more appreciation and insight, I know that this family wouldn't run the way it does without you.
You've never tried to be a replacement for my biological parent, you simply became a new one. In fact, you've kept me grounded when my anger for them ran high. But without hesitation, you've always stepped up. Whether it was a ride to who-knows-where, a helping hand, or just an ear to listen; whether you had the whole day free or were totally swamped: you stepped in.
Believe me, I know there have been many times you could have turned your back on me. Times I probably would have deserved it. I haven't always given you the respect you deserve, and I'm sorry for the attitude that fell onto you simply because I thought it could. At points, I have seen you as the enemy. In my teenage angst, I swore you only stood your ground with me to please your spouse. In reality, it was always because you actually loved me. Because, by choice, you gave a shit.
Over the years, our bond has grown stronger. Our useless arguments have been replaced by inspiring conversations. The metaphorical divide that once sat between us is now filled with your crazy stories and priceless advice. And above all, our dysfunction has been replaced with a friendship.
So thank you. Thank you for standing up for me and standing up with me, even when you never had to. Thank you for loving your spouse, my parent, so deeply and giving them the happiness they deserve. Thank you for never giving up on me. Thank you for taking your time, energy, and strength to make things work -- though at times I was damn near impossible. Thank you for your jokes (yes, I said it), your stories, your advice, and the memories we've made along the way. Thank you for being my parent as well as my friend. Thank you for stepping up, stepping in, for choosing to be my parent, and choosing to love me.
I love you.
Always,
Your Daughter.
