To the Studious Stresser,
At 13 you were thrown into a school that contained such drastic differences in age and maturity and were expected to know how to adapt. At 14 you realized that some kid's priorities lied with their GPA, some with how they were going to get to their after school job, some with their sports team's game the next day, some with how they were going to escape their abusive parents that evening, and some with how they were going to face their crush in the hallway after class. You were expected to know where you stood.
At 16 you were bombarded with the first wave of adult responsibilities: learning to drive a car, finding and maintaining a job, adapting to newer and harder classes in school, and taking test after test that would determine your academic future for the next four years. You were expected to handle all of that with ease.
At 17 and 18, still a child, you were told to apply to schools and programs that would take you far away from home and everything familiar and put you into the real world. You were expected to already know what you wanted to do for the rest of your life.
From the ages 18-22 you are expected to attend university and become a functional part of society, even when you have not slept in 17 hours because the only thing that has not changed in all your years of schooling is that grades are more important than your mental health. After college you are expected to jump into a high paying, professional job, get married, and have children so the cycle can start all over.
You have so many expectations attached to you that you've become a body of sticky notes of To-Do's.
Stop.
Breathe.
Here's the great part about life: it is literally yours to live. Make it the life that you want to live. Society wants you to follow a guideline to get you on the "right path" for your whole life. It's all with good intentions, but the fact is that it just does not apply to everybody. Society has all of these expectations of you and how you should conduct your life, but you get to decide whose expectations you want to live up to: society's, your parents, your peers, or your own.
You do not have to go to college. You also do not have to go to college when you are still a teenager; if you want to go but aren't sure about it yet, wait! There is no problem with either situation. It is your education and you should be able to make that decision on your own, not by the trends of a society.
You cannot control the job market. It is possible and likely that you will not get a professional career within your major straight out of college, and that's okay. Yes, it is disheartening, but you are not alone. You cannot control the job market, and you cannot be expected to know the fluxes of it, either.
You do not have to get married and start a family right away, or at all, actually. That decision was never a society's to make; that decision lies with you and you alone.
In short, life will throw curveball after curveball at you. You are expected by society to hit homeruns every time, but sometimes you have to bunt it and run for first base. The expectations of you should be made by you. You know your abilities and limitations, and you know what is best for you. Hold yourself to your own standards because you are the only person who gets to decide how to live your life.
Always with support,
Constantly Changing Courses
