I have never been an easy person to love and cannot say I ever will be. I have always struggled with talking about my feelings and expressing them in the right ways. I have been hurt far more than once in my life and have had countless people walk out. These kinds of things constantly sit in the back of my head: what I did wrong in past relationships, who walked out, the words they said to me. It all is a constant thought in the back of my mind that forces me to keep a guard up when others try to get in. Breaking down that wall takes time, effort but most importantly, patience.
Nobody ever told me love would be easy, but they also never told me it would be this complicated; finding someone who wants to take the time to get to know all of the little things about you or learn your favorite things so they can surprise you when you least expect it. A person who thinks you are worth the time, effort and patience is the person you deserve. Everything takes time, but the person who sees so highly of you to wait and put in the effort as long as they have to, is the person who will change your life.
To the one being patient with me, I thank you.
I thank you for putting up with me even though I can be the most complicated person in the world. I thank you for showing me people do still care about others and the importance of taking the time to get to know them. For showing me that giving up on someone so easily is not just something of the past. For doing all of the little things that prove an old-fashioned relationship is still possible. I thank you for understanding my passions, my career drive and my focus on where I hope to be in the future. For understanding the fact I am an old person in a young person's body.
But mostly, I thank you for being patient; hearing about my past and doing what you can to make me realize this time is different. Doing your best to understand what I have been through and why I am the way I am - why I put walls up. For pushing my belief in true, genuine happiness. All of the things you do, and what you do it for, takes a lot of patience and I know that. And because of that, I appreciate you.
I cannot say that I am always the easiest person to get along with or the best person when it comes to relationships. One day it will all make sense and all of the effort and time you put it in will be worth something. I make things difficult and I make things complicated, it is who I am and it is what I do when it comes to relationships. But I thank you for doing the things you do and just being who you are. I never told you it would be easy, but one thing I can promise you is I will be worth the wait.
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