Put it this way- if I had a dollar for every guy who I heard broke things off with a girl because "it felt too much like a relationship," I would probably be a millionaire.
The worst part? I know I'm not the only one.
You'll meet a guy. Things are slow at first... but then the next thing you know, you're spending every minute of the day together. You get food together, study in the library with each other for hours on end, and binge-watch your favorite Netflix shows like it's your job. You basically turn into the same person. You like all the same things and share similar tastes-- from having the same obsession with a certain food to even sharing a common love for dogs. You start asking yourself how it is physically possible to share so many things in common with another human being.
You didn't expect things to go this smoothly, but now that they are, you're already in too deep and it's almost too late to turn back. There is nothing that you can do except sit back and roll with the punches.
For the longest time, you had a wall built up. Every failed relationship in the past, you built the wall higher and higher, but with him...you started to slowly break it down.
Everything is going perfectly-- things could not possibly get better. Then, one day, out of the blue, he becomes super distant.
Blindsides the hell out of you.
You text him shyly and ask what's wrong. Any decent guy would come over to end things, but most others unfortunately just choose to end things via text. (Nice.)
"I've been thinking... This has just been feeling too much like a relationship and I don't want that".
Ohhhh, have I heard that one before.
Completely caught off guard, you try to negotiate with him. "Why are you acting this way? Where did this come from?"
You go back and forth for hours and ultimately "agree" that you should end things, even though we all know that is not what you wanted to do.
The next few days and even weeks you spend questioning yourself to no end. You torture yourself, asking yourself things like "What did I do wrong? What could I have done better? Why does this always happen to me?" But ultimately, you are left with no closure whatsoever other than the fact that he "wasn't ready for a relationship".
So here's my question- if two people enjoy each others presence and genuinely like spending time with each other, why does there have to be so much pressure to start a relationship? Why is every male in our generation obsessed with the future and the labels that come with it? Why can't a boy and a girl spend time together without one or the other obsessing over the coming months? Why would you end something so genuine just because of the fear of being "tied down"?
After breaking down once or twice, you put the wall right back up that you spent so much time trying to break down.
If only there will ever be a day where you can find a person who is focused on living in and enjoying the present because life is way too short to obsess over labels and the future.
To the guy who broke things off because he didn't want a relationship, I hope you realize the things you are missing out on and know that I won't be here waiting for you when you change your mind.
