Dear new girl,
Hello. First, let me start off by saying some things that I'm sure of. I'm sure that we will never have the pleasure of meeting each other. I'm sure you are one amazing girl. I'm sure that you are intelligent. And I'm sure that you are beautiful, both inside and out. But what I'm not sure of is that you fully understand what lies ahead of you. I mean how could you? He seems so fascinating and perfect. He's charming, he's funny, he's handsome, and he's strong. He makes you feel like you're on top of the world. He makes you laugh until you're blue in the face and have tears rolling endlessly down your face. He makes you feel like you are the most beautiful girl that has ever crossed his path. He makes you feel special because he remembers the little details about you, he listens. He makes you feel like the world stops and time is nothing when you two are together. He makes you feel safe. He makes you feel a lot of things.
Let me pause for a second. What I need for you to understand is that these feelings are all something that he wants you to feel. He wants you to feel secure with him. He wants you to feel special by remembering everything you have ever said to him. He wants you to feel that he is just absolutely perfect. He wants you to feel like the world stops when you're with him. Until one day, it's suddenly different. He stops making you feel all of these things.
Now you feel like you are walking on eggshells around him. Now you feel like you are always watching what you say because you don't know what is going to make him mad. Now you feel like you can't tell him what is really going on because he's just going to tell you to "get over it." Now you feel like everything you do "sucks" because that's what he tells you. Now you feel like you aren't the person you once were. Now you just feel different. Now you feel numb, something you never thought you'd ever feel... or let yourself feel from a relationship.
He's changed you as a person. He tries to manipulate the way you view the world. He has a dark and twisted way of thinking, a way you never thought was possible. Someone who was once so charming, funny and handsome is now cold, somber and, let's just be honest, he's just unattractive now. It's crazy, right? In the back of my head, I always thought that somehow and someway he would change. But looking back on it, I feel silly to even have had such a thought; you physically cannot change a person, they can only change themselves.
He's said countless hurtful things to me that will forever and always stay in my memory; I stopped loving myself. Out of all the words I have said in this article, I want you to keep this one thing in your mind. I want you to know that it's okay to let go, you have to; and I promise you that if you do, you will learn to love yourself again. Trust in men may be broken, friends may have been lost, you feel tired both emotionally and mentally but I promise it gets better. The saying "time heals all wounds" is truer now than I have ever thought.
Value yourself. Forgive yourself. But most importantly, love yourself.
