To The Girl Who Loves You Next

To The Girl Who Loves You Next

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Dear new girl,

Hello. First, let me start off by saying some things that I'm sure of. I'm sure that we will never have the pleasure of meeting each other. I'm sure you are one amazing girl. I'm sure that you are intelligent. And I'm sure that you are beautiful, both inside and out. But what I'm not sure of is that you fully understand what lies ahead of you. I mean how could you? He seems so fascinating and perfect. He's charming, he's funny, he's handsome, and he's strong. He makes you feel like you're on top of the world. He makes you laugh until you're blue in the face and have tears rolling endlessly down your face. He makes you feel like you are the most beautiful girl that has ever crossed his path. He makes you feel special because he remembers the little details about you, he listens. He makes you feel like the world stops and time is nothing when you two are together. He makes you feel safe. He makes you feel a lot of things.

Let me pause for a second. What I need for you to understand is that these feelings are all something that he wants you to feel. He wants you to feel secure with him. He wants you to feel special by remembering everything you have ever said to him. He wants you to feel that he is just absolutely perfect. He wants you to feel like the world stops when you're with him. Until one day, it's suddenly different. He stops making you feel all of these things.

Now you feel like you are walking on eggshells around him. Now you feel like you are always watching what you say because you don't know what is going to make him mad. Now you feel like you can't tell him what is really going on because he's just going to tell you to "get over it." Now you feel like everything you do "sucks" because that's what he tells you. Now you feel like you aren't the person you once were. Now you just feel different. Now you feel numb, something you never thought you'd ever feel... or let yourself feel from a relationship.

He's changed you as a person. He tries to manipulate the way you view the world. He has a dark and twisted way of thinking, a way you never thought was possible. Someone who was once so charming, funny and handsome is now cold, somber and, let's just be honest, he's just unattractive now. It's crazy, right? In the back of my head, I always thought that somehow and someway he would change. But looking back on it, I feel silly to even have had such a thought; you physically cannot change a person, they can only change themselves.

He's said countless hurtful things to me that will forever and always stay in my memory; I stopped loving myself. Out of all the words I have said in this article, I want you to keep this one thing in your mind. I want you to know that it's okay to let go, you have to; and I promise you that if you do, you will learn to love yourself again. Trust in men may be broken, friends may have been lost, you feel tired both emotionally and mentally but I promise it gets better. The saying "time heals all wounds" is truer now than I have ever thought.

Value yourself. Forgive yourself. But most importantly, love yourself.

Cover Image Credit: Ron Richards Photography

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8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.
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Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.


7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

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4 Signs You Are NOT Ready To Be In A Relationship

Being single isn't the end of the world, and if you think it is maybe you should re-check your priorities.

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Most people dream of finding the one. Spending months to years getting to know them, to settle down, have a life that they are comfortable with, with the person they share a deep connection. But if you are in your late teens or early twenties still in college wishing for this to happen to you, maybe you should look around and really take into consideration if you are ready for a relationship.

1.  All you can think about is having a significant other 

Now it's not bad if every now and then you take some time to really debate what you want in a partner and what your standards are. There is nothing wrong with looking around and seeing what you want and don't want in a partner, but if it constantly taking up space in your mind, you might need to take a step back and focus on other things.

 2. Your phone is full of dating apps 

Some people use these web tools to search and find people just looking for fun. But if you have multiple apps and you still are single it might be time to delete them and pour all the energy and attention to yourself and your hobbies. Dating apps aren't a bad thing if you make clear what you are looking for, but if it comes down to the fact that you are paying for extra swipes, maybe save that money and go spend it on a coffee.

3. You think about your ex...a lot 

Getting closure is a vital part of life. An ex is someone who will always have an impact on your life even if is in the way of choosing a type of food over another, or new music on your travel playlist. But if you are still pondering the breakup, or writing poetry, or crying casually over them a few times a month, you are far from closure.

4. You don’t love yourself 100%

If you are looking for someone to complete you, you might want to look in the mirror because that is the only person who can make you happy. The only person who can make you the person you dream of being one day is the one that you try to tune out, the one who you blame for being single, the one who you are desperately trying to find love for. If you don't love yourself then you won't find love anywhere else.

Loving yourself is something that should come naturally and loving someone else should too. But until you have a complete vision of what your values are no one can walk into your life and find them for you.

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