In life, we face a lot of challenges. We experience loss, pain, hurt, grief, guilt, and so much more.
Our lives change, and we change too. So its okay to have to find out who you are as a person when sometimes changes, its okay to not know who you are; as long as youre trying to find out.
Recently, I've had to find out who I was again. I had to find who exactly I was and what exactly I wanted.
And let me tell you, it has not been easy. At all. It involves a lot of doubt, worrying, stress; all this stuff we feel like we are too young to be going through. But the fact of the matter is, we're growing up so we have to deal with it and learn how to cope.
It does not happen overnight, it happens day by day. You take each day as it comes, and you do your best and get through it. And before you know it, a week will have passed, then a month, then a few months.
So here are a few things that I have come to realize actually help
1. Talk about it. Let your friends help you become who you want to be. But don't feel like you have to do exactly what they suggest or cope how they say is best. Soon enough you'll find out what actually helps you, and what unfortunately makes it worse.
2. Do things you used to love doing. For me, that includes riding my horses. Life gets so busy we stop doing the little things that bring us joy. Paint a picture, start working out again, pick up a new hobby.
3. Find good music. Sometimes I listen to country, sometimes I listen to worship, and some days-like today- I listen to Nickelback. Find a song that speaks to you and wear it out. Then find another one. Really listen to the lyrics and realize people go through things too. Pain, suffering, heartbreak, whatever it is, everyones else goes through it at some point in time. There are highs and there are lows.
4. Do what makes you happy. If you have the urge to cut your hair, or change majors, or change your style. Go for it. Focus on your school, focus on your job, focus on what makes you happy. You aren't the same person you used to be, so you don't have to act like you still are if you don't want too.
5. Enjoy life. Sometimes you will have hard days. Sometimes you will have good days. And the bad days truly do make you appreciate the good so much more. But slowly it will all start to come together.
One day, you will wake up and the person you want to be will be you. You will have made it.
So do what you want to do, to be who you want to be. Its your live so live it and be happy. You don't have to completely change your entire life, you can if you want, or you can just give yourself some time and let it fall into place. It will. One day you will wake up and realize it has all fallen into place. For me, sometimes I feel like I've made it, but somedays I don't quite feel like I am there yet. But I know its happening, slowly but surely.
Don't rush it.
Enjoy the little things.
Look back and smile from the good times, and remember the lessons learned from the bad times, but move forward.
