Somewhere along the way I have mixed up the differences in loving and saving. And that has caused me more heartbreaks and long nights crying to my mom then I'd like to admit. There's something about someone who is broken that intrigues me. Maybe it's the raw emotions or the way they view life through their shattered lenses or even the way that you can never disappoint them.

Truth be told, we're all a little broken in some form or another. I learned that early on, and because of that I have always managed to find someone who's brokenness coincided with mine. Someone who realized that I was never meant to be perfect and that was okay because perfect wasn't even a word they had known. I've always been drawn to people who were struggling and maybe that's because I was struggling too.

I never held myself on a pedestal or thought I was "holier than thou" for believing that I could save someone or turn their life around. It was more or less the concept of it all- the thought that I could save someone when I truly couldn't even save myself.

So, eventually I fell for someone who needed saving. Someone who I thought desperately needed me and I convinced not only them, but myself that, that was love. Being dependent on each other while also viewing ourselves as the only solution of even our darkest problems was love.Let me let you in on a little secret, it wasn't. It wasn't love at all. It's nearly impossible to love someone that is broken. They don't yet know the power of their heart. They don't believe that they can be healed, that the world is still beautiful, and love is real.

But you're determined to show them.

You patiently wait as they learn to love again, not only themselves, but you. You forgive as they push you away, as they hurt you, as they break down who you are in the process of rebuilding themselves.

The thing is, you are a fixer. Which means you often throw yourself into relationships that are no good for you with men who are going to shatter your heart into a million pieces and not think twice about it. yet you go in fearless.

It's unhealthy, really, to love people who aren't good for you...not that I'm telling you something you don't already know. To try and mend someone who can only mend themselves. You can't get a good picture of yourself through a broken mirror, so how are you able to see a broken person for all that they are? It's simple, you can't. But you try to because it's inherent within you to care.

And you don't ever have to apologize for that.

Just because you are a fixer doesn't mean you have to fix everyone. You can help, you can guide, and you can occasionally assist, but eventually you have to step out of the fire and let people save themselves from the flames.

You can't save people no matter how much effort you put into them or how much you love them. You can't be someone's savior because they need to be their own, they need to love themselves, and learn to love you, and not the kind of love you have become accustomed to either.

You can't love anyone into change and that has been my biggest problem. I thought by keeping someone sheltered it would help them heal. But the thing about healing is you have to experience the hurt first. You have to know the brutality of the wound in order to recognize the beauty of the scar.

Maybe I have always been a fixer. Always seeing the worst in someone but knowing all the potential that can come from even their darkest sides. Maybe it's because I never wanted anyone to experience hurt if they didn't have to. I've always been the girl who just wanted to keep the people I love, safe. The girl who wants to make good people out of bad situations or to give strength where there is none. It may sound a bit selfish but I promise, it's with good intentions.

There comes a time when you have to step back and realize you cannot be everything to everyone and the sooner you realize this, the better.

People have to learn to be strong on their own and to fix themselves on their own. Your strength and self-worth is not dependent on how many people you save or try to save. Your self worth is dependent on your capacity to love and if you're trying to love someone before they have even learned to love themselves, that speaks volumes.

Regardless of what the world tells you, stay a fixer. Stay a woman who loves and tries to love even the most broken of people. Just please don't let anyone destroy you in the process. Always know what you deserve and never accept anything less than that.

Because the right man won't need to be fixed. He will love every bit of that whole heart of yours. And know, as much love as you give, he will give back to you and more.. So, please take some down time, don't pick up any more projects, and work on yourself until someone worthy of all your effort finally comes along.

You have so much love to give, don't let it go to waste.