To The Girl That Misses Him

To The Girl That Misses Him

It's okay.
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It’s okay to miss him.

What’s not okay is constantly questioning your worth, feeling so belittled, being treated less than you deserve, making excuses for the toxic person you so truly believe you’re in love with. Imagine questioning someone’s feelings for you every second of every single day. Imagine the kind of negative thoughts that run through your mind. What kind of relationship would that be? If it was someone that truly loved you, you would never feel so low.

When you miss someone, you automatically think about all the good times you had together. You remember all the little things that you love about him and that you miss doing with him. You let the bad memories escape your mind because you believe deep down that he is still everything you want. Everything happens for a reason and I promise you there is a reason you two are not together.

I stayed with a boy who I knew deep down wasn’t right for me. He made me feel like I was nothing and everything all at once. I made excuses for the way he treated me because I thought that was how he expressed love. He used me, lied to me, made me feel like I was worth absolutely nothing, and I let it go. I constantly had voices inside of my head begging me to stop this, begging me to get out of there and save myself from the heartbreak that I knew was going to come sooner or later. But this is who I’ve wanted for so long and who I’ve been waiting for, so how could I leave?



He only wanted to be with me when it was just the two of us. In other words, that he would never actually admit to me, he was embarrassed to be with me. Every time we were placed in a social setting he would treat me like a completely different person than he did when we were laying in his bed telling each other every little detail about our lives. I was still the girl he brought to his roof and talked to every night under the stars. I was still the girl he wanted to come home to every night. So I just told myself that he wants to be with the guys and I’ll get to be with him as much as I want later. Because when he looked me it felt like nothing else mattered. When he kissed me I forgot every single thing he did that hurt me. Nothing in that moment mattered anymore because he was still mine. I had exactly who I wanted in my arms and I wasn’t going to risk losing him. So I kept my mouth shut. I let him ignore me when we were out, I let him use me, I let him break promises, I let myself get lost in him, I let myself change into another person just to please him.

I still miss him, I still think about him, I still see him and get that sickening feeling in my stomach. But I don’t allow that to fool me. I remind myself that I felt so broken when I was with him. I realized my worth and I won’t settle for less than I deserve. I now walk with my head held high and smile because I am happy. I have amazing people in my life now that I would have never had the opportunity to meet if it weren’t for him. Through all the highs and the very lowest of lows with him, I am still thankful he was apart of my life. Without him, I wouldn’t have been able to grow into the person I am today and meet the most incredible people that are in my life now.

No matter what, always be thankful that you had those incredible moments with him. Even though you may be sad now, just remember to be happy you got to share those times together.

Cover Image Credit: Detty Nemeth

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21 Reasons You Should Date Someone Who Was A Camp Counselor

Spouse and parent material, all wrapped up in an animal shirt, Nike shorts, and Chacos.
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1. They shop at Goodwill mostly... low maintenance you could say?

SEE ALSO: The ABC's Of Summer Camp

2. They are pretty awesome at talking to parents... opening days have given good practice for them. Give them 15 minutes and they will become best friends with your parents.

3. Their best friends actually are long distance...so you can wait a while to meet their besties who will want to know everything about you and make sure your intentions are good.

4. They have learned how to look decently presentable without showering for a week... maybe two...you may or may not like this one.

5. They are always down for adventure... sure let's hike for eight miles uphill in the middle of the week!

6. They know what it is like to be woken up at 2 a.m. because someone wet their bed... mom training.

7. They also know how to give the "modest is hottest" talk to the teenage campers... and will help give you a classy future daughter.

8. Building fires is their hidden talent... if you ever get stuck on a deserted island with them they can help you.

9. Animal shirts are a common clothing item... they know how to have fun.

10. They throw killer dance parties... ones your grandma would approve of.

11. They are used to being publicly embarrassed for others (their campers') enjoyment... and usually can take a joke or prank well.

12. They also know how to prank you back... summer camp prepares you for awesome prank wars.

13. If you want to see her with no makeup on just look at her camp photos... natural beauty?

14. They actually love children... they chose to spend a whole summer loving other people's kids; imagine how awesome they will treat their own.

15. Chances are they are a really fun person and will bring out your inner child... yes, climb that random tree and paint your face because it is Wednesday.

16. Their "real job" will come later in life... they will end up being successful. Most employers love to hire former counselors, so it is not a waste of a summer.

17. They know how to hide their favorites in life really well... so if they choose to date you they are basically saying you are their favorite and that is a big deal to them.

18. They have learned how to eat unhealthy food every day for a whole summer and stay in shape... or try to at least.

19. They also are obviously not a diva when it comes to material needs...they went a whole summer without even air conditioning and never complained.

20. If they love you anything like they love their campers your needs will always be put first...they are some of the most selfless people you will ever meet.

21. They love God, living for Him, and have already made a difference in many children's lives... they are the real MVPS.

If you are still looking for a place to work this summer and love adventure, Jesus, and children, apply for Camp Crestridge for Girls; they still have many positions available. I'll be there so you should too!

If you are a boy apply for Camp Ridgecrest for Boys!

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You've Heard Of 'How To Be Single,' But Let's Talk About 'How To Be Romantic'

For some of us, it takes work to be cutesy and romantic.

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Okay, I'm probably the least romantic person anyone has ever met. Not to say that I'm a bad girlfriend or that I'm not caring. I just find love in simple things like knowing what to order for them at restaurants, doing their laundry, planning unique dates, or cooking for them. It's not that I'm opposed to being arduous, I've just never been a chocolate and flowers kind of girl. I'm more of a Mongolian hot pot and "let's walk across the Brooklyn Bridge!" kind of girl. I appreciate some effort, tailoring something to fit a person's idiosyncratic personality or general spontaneity, not how flowery something looks. Not saying that I'm not feminine, I'm just my own entity, so to speak, and that translates into my love life. Needless to say, I thought I should learn how the other half lives, so I've challenged myself to take a course on being a classic/hopeless romantic just to understand how others think and who knows I might change some of my habits!

1. Leave notes

I think it's a really cute and simple idea that I will try to do because it makes everything very personal.

2. Write them a poem

I've had this done for me but I've never actually done it, because believe it or not, I didn't like to read or write poems up until this year.

3. Cuddling

Okay, so I'm not a cuddler, I have no idea why — it's more or less a personal space and attachment issue, I guess. I love hugs though! I guess I just have to be in the mood to cuddle and at times I can be. Other times it just makes me nervous.

4. Dedicate a song to them on the radio

It seems like the people on the radio that do this are crazy in love and honestly, to be able to have the ability to go on the radio and just declare your love for someone else is really inspiring.

5. Surprise them!

I personally cannot stand surprises, but I love to surprise other people and just be spontaneous, so I sort of do this already.

6. Carve your names into a tree

I've thought about doing this, but I've never got around to it, so I promise one day I will.

7. Go see a romantic movie

Nope, nope, I'll barf! Not happening, strictly horror movies for this girl, sorry!

8. Make them a care package

See, this makes me think a lot about what really defines romantic, because I do this all the time, but I don't consider it romantic, I just think it's sweet.

9. Take a walk on the beach together

I've done this, but I have to be doing this while looking for seashells or I feel like I'll be bored.

10. Make a CD for them

"THE PERKS OF BEING A WALLFLOWER," CHARLIE IS QUAKING.

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