Dear Momma and Dad,

Finally, I realize it all...NOW?!?!?!?!

I'm sitting here, writing. Not knowing what to exactly say, but I hope I'm going in the general "I miss you and "I never knew I needed you that much" kind of direction. I'm sitting here thinking, too.

Freedom; to blossom into my own unique personality all over again and being a new and creatively balanced lifestyle. Freedom; to say what my soul speaks and heart craves. Freedom; to become voiced and to inspire others within my own talented constructs.

But with this freedom I so badly needed- came with immense, serious, and impulsive opportunities I needed to handle. Immense amounts of time to get lost within it and lose sight of my goals, fall off track, and fail. I am scared- I won't admit it though.

Serious times, away from home and still trying to grow up, but without someone to correct your each and every fault. Which worries me and gives me doubts, daily. Impulsive opportunities everywhere I could see and immediately run to. Yes. I am sorry but no need to talk, don't worry! I will just take a grounding...right now.

Overall, I needed to understand that this was important- this was it. This was the final test- this was the first, last, and every quiz in the middle- all bundles up into one, fat exam. Within the endless and infinite amount of time allotted, each day I seem to be pressured and challenged within the directions of life.

I feel like day to day they change and I can't keep up. Feeling unwillingly unprepared, and curiously anxious to advance forward; I know I will take everything you both have stored into my brain, and everything I have been taught (....even the "old school" things), and mold it into myself.

Forcing and bestowing every last bit of weary and crazy tips, important dates, and all my childhood memories into my heart. I feel like it is over and now, I miss it.

I'm sitting here, writing,- thinking how much I desired to be free from the two humans who raised me through their lives. The same two people, who unknowingly devoted so much more time and patience, love and care, and genuine support than eyes could see. It was the duties and responsibility of a life to handle behind the stage, in which no one was there to see.

So Momma and Dad, I never will give up on the direction my life is going. I know we are all scared to think of how I'm doing. Me too, even. BUT, I pinky promise and solemnly swear to you both, that I will apply your words, wisdom, and experience to myself.

I love and I miss you, so much (even though I may only show it behind the scenes).

Forever and a day,

Your daughter, Morose.